Smells like......nevermind

Cant stop Memory Loss : SDM

2009-01-19T22:05:00.003+05:30

Cant stop Memory Loss : SDM+

Too much of Ghajini Effect.
Forgetting seems to be the latest trend
The movie may have hypnotic effect..So much so that people coming out of the theatre dont seem to recall how the movie was!
So they go to watch it over n over again..
And the movie breaks box office records!Duh!
Now when I tell my boss " I forgot" or " I can't remember" he does'nt really mind!

As regards Slumdog Millionaire,I coud'nt sail past the first 15 Mins! And for once I really wished I had STML.

What's with this Western fascination for Subcontinental filth & scum? From Octopussy to City of Joy, for once I feel snake charmers & roadside cattle were better ambassadors of mythical India!!

Thanks a lot SDM for now officially anointing Mumbai as the slum capital of the world! Do we want an Oscar for this?

The Eternal Gold Rush!!

2008-08-15T16:14:00.004+05:30

India's affinity for the yellow metal is no news to anyone. So also is India's insatiable hunger for the evasive Olympic Gold Medal!!! We consume nearly 800 Tonnes of the metal every year, the largest in the world. While the country's Gold Reserves are supposed to protect against depreciation of the Indian rupee against US $, Olympic Gold Medals are in great demand to save us from eternal Global embarrassment from World Sports Arena.

Imagine the pressure of 1.2 Billion people on a small contingent of olympians, the so far unknown shooters,archers,boxers, rowers, shuttlers, and other rookies who have gone( along with some repeat & aged offenders )to represent our sporting skills the International Field. As it is, our national Passion , Cricket, has not managed to secure a spot in Olympics. India's shocking failure to qualify for the Hockey Olympics only added to the misery of the Indian Contingent. Besides, the apathy from Govt and Corporates alike, towards developing/popularising smaller but economic sports has made us totally oblivious of our little local heroes from other sports.

Abhinav Bindra has opened the eyes of Indians at last...that there is life beyond Cricket, Hockey or even Tennis. Kudos to Him for achieving the lone and evasive Individual Gold for our Country.

Gold or No gold, Hats off to all the Indian Sportsmen& women who have had the courage to go forward and participate in the Olympics with so much pressure and pain on their backs!!!!!!

Happy I-Day!!!!!

Dollar Deals

2007-10-08T12:54:00.000+05:30

Dollar Stores 49 -99

That may be a cheap replica but most mumbaikars are familiar with this omnipresent logo, sported prominently in most of the malls across the city. The shop is known for bringing everyday american products/brands to Indian shelves. You might have not even heard of most of these brands on display but for a price of Rs. 49/99/149 any thing with that "Made in Amreeka" tag sets your pulses rising!(Like 7 Cans of Stars & Stripes for Rs.99.)

Even though most of these items are also locally available, the sheer thrill of Amreekana is palapable, going by the hep/yuppie crowds that throng this shop! I spent around 2 hours in one of these outlets 9 ( how bored I could have been?) for a customer-product analysis:

Most people buy age defying cosmetics,

many buy beverages & choclolates,

and some, even buy detergents!!

(incidentally most of these detergents arefor for winter clothing to be used with warm water in washing machines !)

On the flip side, considering the fact that the Indian Rupee is currently riding an 9.5 Years high breaching the 39 mark vis-a-cis the greenback, the dollar shop seems to be totally unaffected by this! I eevnasked one of the counter guys as to why the benefit of cheaper import cost is not being passed to customer, to which he cheekily replied- most items were imported half an year ago!!!!!!!!!

I think that sums it all up!!!!!!!

Gandhi Vs Gandhi

2007-10-03T22:56:00.000+05:30

Alright Alright..
I have been away (from blogosphere) for a while.., for a long while rather. Sometimes work pressures puncture your zest and zeal to pen your views in the web. Back with a blast now!

The occasion of International Non Violence Day yesterday were marked by several events across the globe. Yesterday, Congress Chief and UPA Chairperson Sonia Gandhi encountered strong protests from various associations of Indian-American community in New York after she delivered her speech in the UN General Assembly. Considering the International History IQ levels of American people and their representatives, it is not hard to understand why this "Gandhi" chose to speak about Mahatma Gandhi!.

On the telly, I could not take my eye off one of the protestors' placard which read :
Sonia :Secret Bank Account of $2B in Swiss Bank Account.
I'm sure our CBI would have turned a blind eye to this ! I'm not sure if they had the required IQ but they never had Q !!!

Elsewhere in Sweden, Executive Director of the Nobel Foundation Michael Sohlam made a public apology for not awarding the Nobel prize to 5 times nominated Mahatama Gandhi, saying that the decision not to extend him the prize was a mistake.
"We missed a great laureate and that's Gandhi. It is a big regret," he told a News Channel.
"I usually don't comment on what the Nobel Committees or prize awarding institutions decide. But here, they themselves think he is the one missing," he said.
Gandhiji was nominated in 1937, 1938, 1939, 1947 and finally a few days before he was shot dead in January 1948.

In the final analysis, this expression of regret seems to be a greater reward than the award itself , for the World's greatest proponent of Peace and Non-violence !!

Sad Day for Indian Cricket???

2007-04-04T23:09:00.000+05:30

After the stream of events that unfolded today in the Indian Cricket/Media , a prominent News Channel( whose prime anchor happens to be a cricket has been) has gone ahead and termed today as a "Sad Day in Indian Cricket". One is quite confused as to what event could have brought about a sudden pall of gloom, as if it were not already enough!

Was it Sachin's emotional outbursts or Greg's packing of bags?

Beats me!, for I thought it was the saddest day when we lost to Bangladesh , or to Srilanka (or what we call in India the Royal Calypso Collapso!)

The News of Greg Chappel's tendering of resignation should have actually brought some lost glory (and relief!) to senior players, for now they have made it aptly clear to all the wannabe coaches that:

1) no coach can ever mess with them
2) no coach can dare question their attitude or fitness levels
3) no coach can question their cricketing or advertisemnt commitments
4) "It my way or the highway" ( Chappell has indeed made the wise choice, albeit after two years of tinkering with the IMMOVABLE pillars of Indian Cricket)

DEAR GOD........

2007-02-19T21:19:00.000+05:30

I have never written letters to GOD ( Or anybody else!) but I know that this practice is encouraged in several civilized countries to enable kids to link with the supernatural. If you have seen the movie " Bruce Almighty", you would know what I mean! ...God(a.k.a Morgan Freeman) responding to frustrated outbursts and emails.

I hope GOD responds to these too, soon enough, (that is, after he enlarges these in Photoeditor)

Ash Ba Trash

2007-01-18T22:32:00.000+05:30

For the records, I'm neither a fan of Abhishek Rai nor Aishwarya Bacchan but have nothing against them per se.

No offence to Big Bacchanji, but I'm quite apalled by the media coverage of his confirmation of supposed engagement and ensuing marriage of these two darlings of the media. If the news of their "secretive" courting was already in public domain for years, then why should their engagement be such a breaking news? ( ok, except may be for Viviek O or Salman K). I guess it was heart- "Breaking" for the media to have found out an unnatural ending to this relationship..culminating in marriage, instead of a mirage!!!

I don't think anybody really cares whether Ash carries, marries or buries her current/past/future beau. Its the press and the media which have fabricated this into a sensational news , like the Noida butchery, only here ,we are yet to find out who is the butcher!

For almost a week now, all the news channels have been airing the footages from "Guru" or "Umrao Jaan" ad nauseum to corroborate the engagement news! Like this is not enough, we now have the "Shilpa Shetty - victim of racism" controversy.In a country where millions of people who are victims of racism and discrimation in their everyday life never managed to catch the attention of the bosses, Shilpa Shetty's tears from UK changed all that over night?

Why is the Indian media so celebrity crazy?

Secret behind "Mewad ka Ice Cream"

2007-01-11T21:44:00.000+05:30

The ubiquous "Mewad ka Ice cream" vendor could hardly miss your eye across Mumbai. His wheeled pushcart is typified by decorative fake flowers, cone hangings, big display of "Mewad ka Ice cream" and English & Hindi. These days some innovative ones also have " neutral ice cream" or " netural flavar" (read natural ) displayed prominently on their cards to catch the attention of modern day health freaks, or may be to put up a bit of competition to the Big players in that market!

What has always amazed me is the fact that for years, these Ice cream wallas have managed to appeal to people of all ages, castes, creed or economic strata! In fact in the buzzing commercial districts like Nariman point, you could see these tie clad, mobile flaunting executives relishing 4 in one I/C + falooda after a heavy lunch. In fact some frequent the stalls so regularly that the vendor prepares the favorite platter at the sight of the clientele descending from scycrapers afar!

While after 20 years in Mumbai I still haven't mustered enough courage to eat in these stalls, I reckon the day is not far.

I wondered about these:

1.The Mewad cart has excellent refridgeration without any power consumption!

2.While hygiene is an issue, the exteriors of cart are neatly maintained.

3. Their cones are very popular, more than other mainstream brands!

4.The origin of "Mewad ka Ice cream" is unknown. Its apparently not trademarked as you can see scoresof vendors across the city.

Mewad, a place of historical significance in Rajastan, is known for its valiant Rajput ruler Maha Rana Pratap ( a.k.a Mewad ka Rana) . I really don't think he or his descendants invented the icecream to earn any royalty from this. SO I URGE the Akhil Bharatiya Mewad ka Iceream Vikreta Association to immediately take needful action to protect its IPR, lest the concept should be hijacked by US!

Happy Lickin! & HNY to all!!

Ant Vs Grasshopper

2006-12-29T21:19:00.000+05:30

A friend of mine sent me this piece to ponder!

An old parable retold:

The old version ....

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summerlong building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks that the ant is a fool. He laughs and dances and frolicking the summer away.

Come winter, the ant is warm and well-fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, he dies in the cold.

The modern (Indian) version...

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant's a fool. He laughs and dances and plays the summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others are cold and starving.

NDTV, BBC, CNN show up to provide pictures of the shivering grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table filled with food. The world is stunned by the sharp & contrasting images. How can the poor grasshopper be allowed to suffer so?

Arundhati Roy stages a demonstration in front of the ant's hill.

Medha Patkar goes on a fast along with other grasshoppers demanding that grasshoppers be relocated to warmer climates during winter.

Amnesty International and Kofi Annan criticize the Indian Government for not upholding the fundamental rights of the grasshopper.

The Internet is flooded with online petitions seeking support to the grasshopper (many promising Heaven andEverlasting Peace for prompt support as against the wrath of God for non-compliance) .

Opposition MPs stage a walkout.Left parties call for "Bharat Bandh" in West Bengal and Kerala demanding a judicial enquiry. Mamta Banerjee goes on fast onto death of self or Grasshopper whichever is earlier.

The CPM in Kerala immediately passes a law preventing ants from working hard in the heat so as to bring about equality of poverty among ants and grasshoppers.

Lalu Prasad allocates one free coach to grasshoppers on all Indian Railway trains, aptly named the 'Grasshopper Rath'.

Finally, a judicial committee drafts the "Prevention of Terrorism Against Grasshoppers Act [POTAGA]", with effect from the beginning of the winter.The ant is fined for failing to comply with POTAGA and, having nothing left to pay his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the Government and handed over to the grasshopper in a ceremony covered in style by NDTV.Arundhati Roy calls it "a triumph of justice".

Lalu calls it 'Socialistic Justice'. CPM calls it the 'revolutionary resurgence of the downtrodden'.

Kofi Annan invites the grasshopper to address the UN General Assembly.

US & UK offer support to Governments' war on ento-hunger with free supplies of Ant-hrax powder!

Many years later...

The ant has migrated to the US and set up a multi-billion dollar company in Silicon Valley named "Triumph-Ant Technologies " , while hundreds of grasshoppers die of starvation and foot in mouth disease somewhere in India.

Moral of the story:
Who cares ? the grasshoppers are dead.

Creative Copy Rights

2006-12-17T18:18:00.000+05:30

I have been coming across a this Hindi(?) pop song playing almost everywhere last week - malls, ringtones, lifts, you name the place. Although Hindi music is not my cup of tea, this song really caught my (ear's) attention. It had a nice bass , beat and melancholic tone to it and even though I couldn't follow the lyrics, I could make out some words like "yaar", "qurban", "ishq" from the song. Absolutely clueless, with this limited piece of knowledge , I put Google to the test of times, but to no avail. Search engines have to be given something to search for , some keywords like artist, film name or song title....bummer!

With some help from a music shanty in nearby market, I deciphered the song title as "Ya Ali" after trying out "Yaara dil", "Yaara ve", "Mera dil" (all of which are also supposedly in the currency) and that was enough for me to google it. My research findings were quite appalling:

1. This song was from a Bollywood movie Gangster(2006) which is apparently a hit movie. The song is also apparently a hit song

2.The song "Ya Ali" has been sung by Zubeein, a Bangladeshi debutante to bollywood and written by some unknown lyricists.

3. The music is copied entirely from the original arabic song " Ya Ghali" by Guitara, who by the way, has fabulously rendered the piece with her lilting and contemporary voice.

4. This is not the first "copied" song making it big in the Bollywood chartbusters. Apparently songs of the arabic king of pop Amr Diab have been regular targets in most of Mahesh Bhatt's movies ( sample the hit song "Kaho na kaho" from Murder(2005) ripped off straight from Amr diab's "Tamaly Maa'k")

5. Blogs abound with disgust over the amount of plagiarism in Bollywood, especially from arabic /spanish music. Most of the bloggers only wished that atleast due recognition in the form of "credit" was given to the original artist. Nevertheless, there was unanimity on the fact that Indians did a great job in copying songs and blending the same with excellent hindi lyrics! You can't simply pass off arabic imports in the indipop scene without good beat or lyrics.

Looks like the usual haven for Indian plagiarists - Western & Disco Music is now nome more in demand. Arabic, Spanish, Sufi music with techno blend seem to be ruling the roosts for now. Not far from now Shakira & Amr Diab could be doing a romanic dance number for the upcoming " Copy Cats"!!!!

Pizza vs.Police????

2006-12-12T22:43:00.000+05:30

"We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police."....Jeff Marder.

Is it not true? Just the other day I ordered for a pizza from a prominent pizza shop and I was told that the same would arrive at my doorstep within 30 minutes ,else, I could have it free. In Mumbai, time flies like arrow while traffic moves like snail. Which is why these delivery guys whiz past you in their customized sleek pizza-mopeds even in the most heavily conjusted roads ! They are forced to ride fast to meet impsossible deadlines or face pay cut on account of customer discount!. Not surprising that their antics feature as one of the prime causes of road accidents in the city.

Even my neighborhood Kiranawala for years offers free home dalivry (sic) but without any guarantee on time. So why these ubiquitous Pizza experts offer such instant deliveries? Is it driven by competition or social service? One such company, a prominent one, has even named its call centre number as "Hunger - Helpline". If only we had more of such helplines across in drought ridden states of India, our hunger problem could be instantly solved, thanks to modern capitalism!

Even the cops don't reach the spot before a good 45 minutes ( except, maybe on celluloid). In fact during Summer vacation our local police issues notices to societies to keep vigil on the neighborhood / appoint private security to prevent burglaries because they are unable to attend to so many calls. So when in emergency, you can always trust your pizza guy to attend on you within 30 minutes and all that he may expect from you is a tip in the hand and a pat on the back !!!!

Reverse Democracy!

2006-12-11T21:06:00.000+05:30

The Prime Minister gave a keynote address at a meeting of the National Development Council in New Delhi on Saturday. It was rare occasion where he made some controversial statements (instead of his usual verbose, vague and threadbare commentary on developmental economics) thereby fuelling widespread and acerbic attacks from the opposition on the substance of the speech. Various leaders from BJP have assailed his speech on the ground that his statement on plans for minorities reeked of "communalism" and gave "undue benefits to minorities". Some have even termed it "gross violation of Constitution"

The controversial lines from the speech are reproduced below:

'I believe our collective priorities are clear: agriculture, irrigation and water resources, health, education, critical investment in rural infrastructure, and the essential public investment needs of general infrastructure, along with programmes for the upliftment of SC/STs -, Other Backward Classes -, minorities and women and children.

'The component plans for scheduled castes and scheduled tribes will need to be revitalized. We will have to devise innovative plans to ensure that minorities, particularly the Muslim minority, are empowered to share equitably in the fruits of development. They must have the first claim on resources. The centre has a myriad other responsibilities whose demands will have to be fitted within the over-all resource availability.'

The bone of contention is in the emboldened letters. It is very difficult to comprehend what the PM intends to convey through these paradoxical statements. It is obvious that no person, whether a majority or a minority community member can share the fruits of economic development "equitably" and "lay first claim on the resources" at the same time!

It is quite understandable that the speech was carefully constructed to meet political ends but was sadly not as discreetly executed! The fact that our PM is not a established "politician" only adds to the woe.

We pride ourself on our strong foundation of democracy. The rule of majority comes with a responsibility to protect the interests of minority. But only in this glorious country we see that a few so called torch bearers of minority communities hold the country's economy at ransom with the politicians dancing to their tune. 5 decades after independence we have no clear statistical data on the minority population in the country. It is not far when a "brahmin" or "jain" will plead for minority status going by sheer percentage of population!

Years of reservation have yeielded no visible results in terms of improvement in literacy or standard of living as the benefit of such regressive policies have been taken by the same families, which are now referred as creamy layer. For that matter the "trickle down" effect of social/human resources expenditure have never reached the desired sector - the poor /farmer! Poverty, Bondage and agriculture have no religion. Child labour and Female infanticide have no religion and so does Battery of women.

Eradication of these social evils do not require any communalistic approach to policies. It needs a total relook at our existing systems with will and committment from politicians & bureaucrats to work for something other than votebanks or bank balances! In fact, every developmental policy must define the target audience in terms of economic background/ age/gender/occupation.

It is quite possible that in a few years from now we will be a democracy only on paper.The creamy layer will be the "Mafia" controlling politics, power & people and the country will be suffering from a state of reverse democracy!

Overwhelmed!

2006-11-22T21:39:00.000+05:30

Despite belonging to one of the *conservative* *relegious* and *multi-theistical* tamil communities from down south, I never had the urge to go to temples. I only occasionally "accompanied" a family member or a freind to a nearby temple. But THIS was different..

We had planned this 3 day trip to Panchgani & Mahabaleshwar. Travel bug had never bit me so far, but a 5 day free luxorious bunglow with backyard, garden & cook at your disposal was too hard to resist" . A good colleague of mine suggested that I take the long way down via Pune ( yeah! Brangelina city of India!) to stop over at the Balaji temple at Ketkewale, around 40 Kms South of Pune in NH4. This temple is supposedly the largest replica of the real Tiupati Trimala Balaji Temple with extremely beatifully decorated, sculpted & well maintained premises. As I casually mentioned this fact to my family, they were pretty sceptical of its likeness to the Tirupati devasthan but probably agreed to visit the temple out of sheer curiosity.

We left Mumbai at 6.00 am and reached the temple at 10.15 am. On seeing the the poor & stony approach road to the temple, my mother who has walking difficulties, preferred to stay back in the vehicle we had hired for the trip ( although with great hesitation) . But the temple officials were very quick to send over a very new & sturdy wheelchair for her and even offered to wheel her for the darshan. We were thoroughly overwhelmed by their gesture and happily rolled her into the temple preemises . All the guards within the complex were kind enough to let us jump the long queue of weary & restless devotees and even the devotees paved the way without a grimace.

All of us had a fleeting but satiating darshan of the almighty. As we proceeded towards the exit, each devotee was not only offered a very big laddu as prasadam, but also a coupon for "bhojana" . The temple official was politely requesting them to avail the "Bhojan" at the adjoining building as he was handing over the tokens to the tired devotees coming from far & away. At the Bhojanalay, the hot food was served by the staff with great hygiene. The place was well maintained & clean with excellent seating arrangement for all the devotees. One could see devotees from all statas of the society seated next to each other enjoying the divine serving !

What moved me was the kindness & courtesy all the officials and guards displayed during such delicate situations. One can probably never witenss such grace towards senior & incapacitated citizens in any other place of worship. To me its was not a temple of lord Balaji, it was a temple of love & kindness and devotion to humanity, which is the need of the hour for the world we live in!

Customer care has always been problem issue for Indian enterprises. Probably they could learn a thing or two from the temple management!!!

Govinda! Govinda!!!

End of Sadma

2006-11-05T21:04:00.000+05:30

After 3 years of trial, the verdict is finally out. Former Iraqi despot Saddam Hussein was sentenced to death by hanging today for his role in the killing of 148 Shiite Muslims in the northern Iraqi village of Dujail following an attempt on his life there in 1982, which was in the backdrop of Iran-Iraq war of the 1980s The Iraqi criminal court sentenced him for " crimes against humanity", along with his half brother. The verdicthas sparked off protests in Sunni dominated areas while there were reports of celebrations in Shia majority parts.

While most of the modern world has hailed this as a victory of democracy over crazy despotism that Iraq has suffered for decades, New Delhi has surprisingly maintained cautioned silence over the verdict. Traditionally , a lot of Muslim bureacrats, diplomats & politicians have been serving our Foreign /External affairs Ministry & Offices. Hence a division of opinion in the ranks cutting across Shia-Sunni sects may not be quite unexpected.

Former diplomat M. Hamid Ansari, has been quoted saying 'judicial process under which Hussein was tried is widely considered to be faulty and, therefore, the verdict is also faulty'. In fact, the Communist Party of India-Marxist (CPI-M) Sunday denounced the death sentence against Hussein, terming it a 'rigged verdict' .

One thing is for sure, Mr Bush cannot bank on this judicial verdict to uplifthis Republican Party from the almost certain loss in the forthcoming election for Senate & HoR!

JAY ki JAI Ho!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-10-13T21:56:00.000+05:30

If it looks like I am spending less and lesser amount of time in blogosphere, blame HIM..
He got me addicted, and then I was free of this affliction when he got off air for quite a long while ( say 4 years) and now he's back!!!!

There is nothing like watching the daily dose of "almost live" telecast of Jay's jabbing at all of the World's top political/entertainment stars , in his own inimitable style.

I always loved Jaywalking, Allstars, Iron Jay and Headlines.

Hoping for more of his wisecracks & snubs!!!!!!!!!

I am from freakistan!!!!!!!

2006-09-30T21:06:00.000+05:30

Yeah Im back alright, but not with a bang though. What Ive been thru for the past two weeks will top the list of freakweeks one has ever had.

Freaked out on:

(1) a lot of B-grade hoolywood flicks on DVDs
( Trial & Error, Company man, Good Advice, You can count on me, Terms of Endearment,Where the truth lies..and they ALL suck in reverse order)

(2) on Lage Raho Munna Bhai... due to excess hype from press & public ( i reserve my comments on this movie plz)

(3) on bad Italian food at Trattoria ( supposed no.1 italian food place in Mumbai) This five star hotel actually served stale pizza crust, stale stuffing and odd as it may seem, the awfully low quantity they served was actually a "saving grace"!!! We actually had to satiate our unfilled bowels with a grilled "sendwitch" and "coketel" from a famous roadside gem of an eatery in the queen's necklace!! Lesson learned: Suburbans should stick to the ubiqutous dominos & pizza huts rather than travelling 25 Kms in search of the perfect pizza fiasco in a Five star plaza.

(4) on Navratri festivities in office, which meant a lot of sweetmeats, colorcodes & time outs!

(5) on my newly acquired vaccum cleanner ( I did!), sucking the hell out of the house!

Amidst all these, I totally lost track of my daily bread..blogging & strumming!
Back in business now. I need no sympathy!

Quest for the ultimate Dustbuster

2006-09-14T17:46:00.000+05:30

I have to get this out of my system.

Let me first give you the low down here.

For the past 5 months, I’ve been desperately looking to buy a replacement for my broken vacuum cleaner(VC).I am now in a miserable predicament. On one hand, I have to do all the dusting employing my own (wo)manual labour and two, I am allergic to dust, not to mention brooms, mops and other cleaning widgets. And having your decrepit house in one of the most polluted suburbs and adjacent to a mud slinging play-ground doesn’t really help.

My VC hunting began with quite a fanfare: comparing models/brand on the net, visiting all the electronic havens and malls in the neighborhood, etc. Almost every gadget-mall had its USP, no, not Selling Proposition but "Special Price" on the items. But what left me cold was despite having mammoth shop space, these so called malls had not even a little room to accomodate, say atleast 2 brands of VCs on the shelf. Most of the shops had only one brand, the prominent Indian brand, carrying Archimedes’ legacy. So much for patriotism. Of course with more& more people (read parvenu) going for LCDs, Microwaves, ACs & Dishwashers, a VC for a measly 3000 Rs may not command any shop space or retail margin.

While my broken VC was made by an reputed Indian Electronics giant, once mostly patronized by people Below Poverty Line, I looked out for more recent entrants in this segment, like the ones which promise to make your Life Good and all. And of course there is the world leader, in the name of an Ex-president of USA. There are several other third rate brands, that you can buy off the TV, use for dusting and throw into the dustbin the third day.

Basically, I looked for a VC fitting into these mimimal specs:
1. Weight – less than 5 kg
2. Suction cum Blower function (with variable-power option)
3. Wattage- 1000 or less
4. Cord -Atleast 5 Mtrs
5. Dust Bag- Permanent, washable and atleast of 3 Ltrs capacity
6. Three pin plug for safety
7. Cost upto Rs 4,000

Innocuous it may seem, but none of the VCs that are currently in the market conform to these. Then I went into research mode & checked out the sites of the three major brands I have alluded to in earlier:

The current models from the land of Taekwondo have no Blower function. I did have an old pamphlet from a shopping exhibition mentioning of a model containing all the specs I wanted. None of the local showrooms had it. When asked , the local sales manager replied that model has since been discontinued (for some Godonlyknowsit reason). He went on and segued into pitching for models from rival brand that I should go for. Some mole he was !

The lone Indian Company spearheading cleanliness revolution in homes & drinking water surprisingly has no model with a 3 pin plug and weighing less than 6 Kg with the above features. What kind of heavy machinery operates in 2 pin? I don’t want to get electrocuted and I surely I don‘t come with a warranty card!

Utterly disappointed, I came crawling back to my old VC maker and was pleasantly surprised to find 2 new models on the site , which even facilitated online purchase. Alas, the site was “outdated’ as confirmed by the local sales rep. It seems they no more manufactured/dealt with VCs as they went for greener pastures and they have a new site in place, only that the old site was not yet taken off the web. How Generous! Good ploy to snatch credit card payments online from unsuspecting customers and pay for court battles between the Corporate patriarch & his Son-in law. Bravo!

Moral of the story:
MNCs companies dump their outdated technologies on the Indian populace. Indian companies have the best technologies but don’t know how to market it to the populace!

I don't believe in employing labour for domestic service. Here I am with no vacuum cleaner in hand, and only my bare hands to bust the dust. I think I may have to carry on this till I bite the dust. Thank you for listening!

P.s: I hate mud slinging as it's me who has to do the clean-up. So I have intentionally kept away from mentioning brand/Company names and leave the guessing to your imagination!!!

Movies, more movies!!

2006-09-12T22:00:00.000+05:30

Im taking a long overdue vacation right now and as usual I'm catching up on lot of movies I wanted to watch for a long time. Here are some of them with my * ratings.

Recent Flicks:
1. Just my Luck:**1/2( Lindsay Lohan as banal as ever)
2. Sentinel: *** ( Thumbs up to Kiefer)
3. Matador:***1/2 ( Pierce Brosnan has tried really hard to shed his Bond image)
4. Dukes of Hazzard: :()-----(pukes)
5. RV: ** ( Robin williams is a sorry state of affairs)
6. Rumor Has it: * ( Kevin Costner has lost it)

Not so recent flicks:
1. Libertine: Sorry, I could not rate it as I failed to get past first 20 mins, But I can sure make it out to be any average Johnny Depp movie, with less of bloody disembowelment scenes and more of venereal/nudity.
2. Kate & Leopold: ***1/2 .please watch it if you like to watch verbal confrontations between victorian english and american slang ( Hugh Jackman vs others)
3.Corky Romano: **, but, Chris Kattan is cut out for such movies.
4.A Bronx Tale:* Frankly speaking,I've been wanting to lay my hand on this DVD for a long time.. one due to my mad passion for mafia movies in general, and two.. watching the dealy duo-Robert De Nero & Chazz Palminteri in action. The lonestar I've given goes to Chazz. Hope that sums it all up as far as this movie is concerned:(

Sure it doesnt look like a perfect vacation..but there are more movies to come. So, I keep my fingers crossed !X!
(Frankie Four Fingers)

Of schizophrenics, shrinks & celluloid!

2006-09-04T22:52:00.000+05:30

More and more people I know refer to Hallucinations, Schizophrenia and Multiple Personality Disorder(MPD) to some phenomena as trivial as common cold. I also get a feeling that many of my near & dear ones suffer from it( I have to talk to my therapist on that one!). Off late, all the filmwoods -(B)(K)(H)ollywood have been churning out movies with the same protagonist potraying both Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde ( I wonder if he ever gets double the pay package?)

Some MPD Hollywood movies I watched include, Hide & Seek(2005), Me Myself & Irene and Batman forever while in Hindi I am told Aparichit(2006), Dewangee(2004) head the list. Now when I come to think of it, Mr AB might have pioneered pseudo-MPD roles in Shahenshah!

The point is, potrayal of mental disorders is now the newest, experimental , bold and one of the *different* roles that every actor wants to attempt or every director wants to depict. Diseases hitherto unheard of by the common movie watching rif-raff are being brought into celluloid and the common vocabulary..MPD, Alzheimer's disease, Short term memory loss, spastics, etc.

Critics are ever tired of pointing out the cavalier manner in which medical ailments are dealt with in Mainstream Hindi cinema. Suddenly, Hindi film directors are dealing with serious ailments and dealing with them seriously!. Gone, are those days when a heroine lost and regained her sight within 13 reels, or a disease as serious as cancer was detected by looking at an X-Ray. In an industry where heroes are mostly immortal and are occasionally even known to return from the dead films are now dealing with delicate medical issues with much more maturity and seriouosness.

In a lighter vein:

1) A guy walks into the psychiatrist's and says "Doctor, doctor, you've got tohelp me! I keep thinking that I'm a deck of cards!" The shrink says "Sit over there and I'll deal with you later."

2)"I'm treating a patient with a split personality," boasted a psychiatrist, "and Medicare pays for both of them!"

3)Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a dustbin.Psychiatrist: Don't talk such rubbish.

4)Patient: Doctor, I keep thinking I'm a curtain.Psychiatrist: Pull yourself together!

5)Two psychiatrists meet on the street. One says to the other,"You know, I thought I'd been completely analyzed, but yesterdayI experienced the most remarkable Freudian Slip."The friend nods and waits to hear more...The first psychiatrist continues, "I was having dinner with mymother, and I meant to say, 'Please pass the butter', but insteadI said, 'You miserable bitch, you've ruined my life!!!".

6)Patient: Doctor, I can't stop stealing things.Psychiatrist: Take these pills. They should help you.Patient: But what if they don't?Psychiatrist: Pick up a Rolls for me.

7)A man who thought he was John the Baptist was disturbing the neighborhood, sofor public safety, he was committed. He was put in a room with another crazyand immediately began his routine, "I am John The Baptist! Jesus Christ hassent me!" The other guy looks at him and declares, "I did *not*!"

8)What is the best thing about schizophrenia?You're never alone.

9)A man calls the psychiatrist at a mental hospital and asks who's in room 24."Nobody" comes the reply."Good" says the man, "I must have escaped."

10)What is the difference between a psychiatrist and a psychologist?If you say to a psychiatrist "I hate my mother", the shrink will ask "Why doyou say that?" while a psychologist will say "Thank you for sharing that with us."

Ok, gotta go!!

Me too!

Thr Lord of the Masses

2006-08-27T10:29:00.000+05:30

Ganpati Bappa, Moorya!!

Some other facts:

1)Public festival:
In the good old days Ganesh festival was a purely family affair. Ganesh Utsav in Mumbai, as envisioned by Tilak actually intended to use the famed "Ganpati" as a relegious icon as a cover for political activity.Tilak did this so as to cleverly broadcast his political message of freedom for India.

2)Gifting:
Thru time, "gifting" have undergone many changes in these years..

-from jewellery to " diamond studded jewellery"
-from books to "autographed /special edition" books
-from antiques to "antique holder"
-from show pieces to "feng-shui"items

However, Ganesha idols have remained to be a favourite gifting product with people, individuals as well as corporate and across communities. Itis said that the joy of gifting a Ganesha is immense because when you gift a Ganesha idol, you gift good wishes and good fortune along with it.

3) Immersion:

Ganesh Visarjan - the relegious ceremony of immersion of the idol in waterbodies on the concluding day (Anant charturdhashi) of the 10 day function is as popular and auspicious as the "chaturthi" itself. It is also one of the largest televised event in the commercial capital of India. It is believed that the wishes made on this occasion are happily granted by the satiated elephant god! As legend goes, "Ganesha" is considered to be the god of wisdom, prudence, prosperity, and most importantly "Vighna harta"(remover of obstacles). Hence, there are plenty of wishes the vast humanity can seek out for , specially, the traumatised and terror stricken Mumbaikars.

4) Darshan galore:

Mumbai will be buzzing throughout these 10 ddays of celebration, withh business picking up during day & night!. Already known as th ecity that never sleeps, on these days in particular, shops are known to remain open even till 5.30 am to capture the devotees travelling across the city for "darshan". It is widely believed that more the number of idols one takes darshan, more shall be resultant blessings/good luck. Lalbaug ka Raja has been the undesputed crowd puller for decades ow. Special city bus & local train services facilitate this local pilgrimage.

5)Ashtavinayak:

There are 8 idols of Lord Ganesh, which are famous by the name of Vinayak, and they are known as ‘Ashta Vinayak’. All the 8 idols of Lord Ganesha are Swayambhu(evolved by themselves):

Vakratunda ( Chintamani)
Mahodara (Varadvinayak)
Lambodara(Baleshwar)
Vignaraj(Vigneshwar)
Ekdanta(Siddhivinayak)
Gajanana(Mahaganapati)
VikataGanapati(Mayureshwar)
Dhoomravarna(Girijatmaja)

ICC or I Can't See??

2006-08-22T20:01:00.000+05:30

I am not an avid cricket fan, but, watching the events develop the last few days, I cannot but write a few thoughts on the ball tampering issue currently plaguing Pakistan.

Why do Asian Cricket teams always get a raw deal from the ICC? , as if it is not enough that these teams have to cope up with internal problems with their Boards, Govt & Tax authoriries.

The entire cricketing fraternity is up in arms against the text book(read deaf & dumb) approach of the ICC over the ball tampering charge & penalty runs levied by the two culprit umpires - Mr Darryl Hair(the prime accused) and Mr BillyDoctrove(the confederate) on the fourth and almost decisive day of Test match between Pakistan& England at Oval. Pakistan's refusal to take the field after tea has got ICC slamming them for *bringing disrepute to the game*. Pakistan's dislike for the controversial Mr Darryl Hair is well known to the whole world and the ICC. Despite this, ICC has *specially* taken upon itself to appoint him as one of the umpires in all the matches involving Pakistan. Should we call it ill-conceived or well-contrived?

It is accepted that teams should not be allowed to influence the choice of umpires, but they must definitely be given a fair say in putting some *esteemed* ones on a negative list, going by thier*past credentials*. If such a list was permitted, Mr Hair would undoubtedly top Pakistan's list while Mr. Steve Bucknor would top team India's black listof umpires. If Mr Hair's past decade of hair-raising umpiring decisions is anything to go by, he should have long been delisted not only from Elite panel but permanently from Umpiring profession itself. How he was reinstated into the Elite group is still a mystery.Could it be Australia's arm twisting or Pakistani's misuse of arm..

Nevertheless, the investigation on the ball tampering issue should concentrate on visual evidence more than anything else to nail the real culprit. The entire career of key players and the pride of the nation are at stake here. In the absence of substantial evidence, Mr Hair & Doctrove shold be given the pink slips for bringing *bringing disrepute to the game*, with appropriate penalty, and prison term!

You may want to Read this.

Sweet Child 'O Mine

2006-08-15T21:29:00.000+05:30

October 10, 2006 shall be a Landmark day for the Indian child. Although there are no official estimates on child labor employed in India, it is believed that over 10 Cr of our little citizens are employed as labour almost everywhere..From hazardous industries, kirana shops to domestic servants, in appalling, exploitive and even inhuman conditions.

Atlast, our government seems to have finally woken up from its deep slumber for last 20 years, since the enactment of the toothless piece of law: Child Labour (Prohibition & Regulation) Act, 1986. In a fresh and determined bid to stamp down the growing exploitation of children, the government has now prohibited their employment as servants at home or in businesses.

"Business" shall include factories, shops, dhabas, restaurants, hotels, teashops,resorts and spas. According to a notification issued by the labour ministry last tuesday, the ban comes into effect from October 10, 2006.The Union labour ministry has warned that anyone employing children below 14 years of age would be liable for prosecution and penal action under the Child Labour (Prohibition & Regulation) Act, 1986. Labour inspectors have been empowered to check on violation of this ban. While this is just the beginning, the crackdown could soon extend to several other sectors employing child labor.

May be Iam brutally candid but I am deeply pained that many of my friends and colleagues have employed children in domestic service, sometimes to babysit their own little ones. They've got good reasons though:

1) They actually plead they are improving the standard of living of the the poor boy/girl (by sending their parents the money, who might blow it off on having more children ?)
2) They claim they treat the child well ( right!, but will send the right back to thier village the moment he/she falls sick)
3) They claim they try & educate the child at home ( if only they had so much time, then why employ a domestic servant!)

Its high time they cleared up these misconceptions from thier inncocent minds.

It is not uncommon to see paper*boys*, chai*boys*, kirana delivery*boys* at your doorstep. The plight of girls is still worse..construction sites, domestic work, hazardous factories. We educated people fail to realise that by employing child labour, we are not economically uplifting them or their families, but we are actually denying their right to childhood, education and opportunities, that we were fortunate enough to enjoy.

It is the sole duty of the State and NGOs to rescue and rehabilitate these deprived children. We should not take advantage of their economic / social background to enrich our materisliatic goals, with the excuse of "helping a poor child". A socially concerned person would rather adopt the same child , instead of seeking a quid pro quo in the form of exploitive labour. In fact the movie "Baagbaan" showcased this noble act when the iconic AB adopts Salman Khan as a child, despite having 4 kids of his own.

So lets take this pledge the August occasion of our Independence day, to liberate our society from this evil:

1. I shall not employ and support any form of exploitation of children including child labour.

2. I shall report immediately any form of violation of child rights to the authorities/NGOs.

3. I shall do my best to educate others on the imporatance of child rights and ills of child labour.

P.s:

Child Employers beware: Big brother may be watching you!!

Don't cha

2006-08-14T20:25:00.000+05:30

No, I'm not referring to that provocative hit single by the Pussycat Dolls. I'm talking about addiction to Cha (Marathi for Tea or Chai).It is quite common to see tired/weary employees gulping down several ounces of this beverage every hour, almost unwittingly and as much unavoidably! As the the canteenboy nonchalantly places his overboiled concoction of sugar & milk on the table, the same vanishes into the alimentary canal in no time! Some of them would'nt even mind drinking the very concotion hours after its served. And then there are tea-conservatives like me who are always at the receiving end .

How?.. You cannot even politely refuse the "tea" offered by your boss b'coz :

a) it might tantamount to gross insubordination, or

b) you might end up getting a big lesson of goodness of tea(and specially black tea) or

c) worse, you might be perceived as a high-maintenance natural juice drinker or a latte drinker!

Many of my friends/colleagues who I presume are tea addicts, can hardly keep count of their comsumption at work. They might pass it off us "2-3 cups a day", while it might actually be 7-8 (including, with chitchat friends, boss, lunchhour etc).

Well, I ve got some news for the habituated tea addict:

Tea connoisseurs say that-

1) Drinking tea should be a soothing and pleasurable experience and not a hurried one (which is very unlike what you notice in the office, where people drink it to get rid of headaches)

2) Tea should be savoured and not gulped down

3) Vital Statistics:3gms of tea for 150ml of water,brew for 3-4 mins normally, while you can brew herbal tea for 7-8 mins.

4) Never add milk to green tea

Food addiction is perhaps one of the commonest reasons why so many people are overweight and yet, don't seem to realise it. That's because they never stop to think before gobbling up everything in sight - whether they are really hungry/thirsty or not. It's more greed than hunger.

So, to all ye concerned, instead of giving me lectures of "revitalising my cells", why not take some therapy for your good self????????????

Floods of Alert

2006-08-12T17:31:00.000+05:30

US has warned *code red* for all its nationals in Mumbai & Delhi, suspecting possible AQ plots in the run-up to the I_day.

The US Embassy said the attacks could possibly occur from Friday till August 16 and the likely targets are airports, vital government installations and crowded places. ( Which part of Mumbai is not crowded? colleges?)

As if the never-ending rains are not enough, we have another threat to keep us indoors. Every alternate day Mr Johnny Joseph's flood alerts clog our sms memory. That does'nt stop the riff raff from going on with their chores.

While the Govt. has officially shrugged off these “very innocuous” advisory issued by the US embassyto its people ,the Centre has actually gone ahead and directed the states to issue advisories/instructions to the general public to verify the antecedents of tenants and buyers of vehicles, an official spokesperson of the Union home ministry said. Meanwhile, a contingent of 38 NSG personnel has been deployed at the Indira Gandhi Centre for Atomic Research at Kalpakkam, near Chennai, following reports that major installations could be targeted by terrorists. Union home secretary has directed various states to sensitise the public and take all necessary precautions.

Desperate measures or innocuous advisory?

You be the judge, while I try to find an open space to hide myself(irony intended)

Killing Time

2006-08-09T19:14:00.000+05:30

As Mumbai has been reeling under heavy rains for the pastweek, Movie buffs like me could not venture out to the bigscreens. So I rented some stuff from my freindly neighbourly DVD rental just to kill time..and guess what!, I actually KILLED it!

Take a look:

1. Last Days ( 2005,Kurt Cobain biopic)..Hawrible..I should have been dead instead of KC
2.Yours Mine & Ours(2005).......................I Threw up..Whatever happened to Mr Bowen (Dennis Quaid) from Dragonheart(1996)
3.Monster in law(2005)..............................J Lo can never make it into mainstream Hollywood with her nasal voice. Michael vartan had better stuck on to "Alias"
4.The Man (2005).......................... was So So, but Sammy Jackson- Cussing = Boring
5. Date movie(2006)..................The regular spoof movie taking digs at all the big un's..Meet the parents , Meet the Fockers, LOTR, When Harry met Sally, Shallow Hal, King Kong, Wedding Planner.. It was like watching "Scary Movie 4" sans the grossness, but still was one of the worst parodies Ive come across..

So there goes my horrible week that was. After watching a fiasco of a movie in POTC-2 on big screen, I am afraid to hitthe theaters. So I returned my good old DVD collection, some of which I watched for the n+1th time:

Golden Eye
National Treasure
LOTR-FOTR
Don't Say a Word
Flight plan

P.S. Little one's would know the connection between these..but don't say a word.

HOME A- LOAN.

2006-08-06T11:38:00.000+05:30

Despite the recent hikes in home loan interest rates announced by the major banks, there seems to be no letdown in the rate of *interest* in the property market.

India's largest housing finance company HDFC, Punjab National Bank and the Oriental Bank of Commerce have hiked interest rates on home loans by at least half a percentage point (0.5%) on August 1, while others like the SBI and Bank of Baroda are soon expected to follow suit. As it stands, the floating rate for home loans from HDFC will be 9.5% as againstm, up from the previous 9%. The fixed rate loan borrowers will now have to shell out as high as 11%p.a. Despite FinMin's friendly advice (read dictum) to PSU Banks to rollback the hikes, there is no looking back, it seems.

Traditionally interest rates tend to take the cue from RBI's repo & reverse repo rate, which incidentally, were raised twice consecutively to over 50 basis points. Home loan rates have gradually risen over the past year or so from 8% to 11% and guess what, no one seems to really bother. Mumbai's bustling property market is currently on a sky-high, thriving on stock market boom fuelled by economic uptrend in general and IT /BPO boom in specific. Everybody seems to carry around enough cash to crash-purchase houses. Even the once abandoned properties such as " jinxed houses" or " haunted buildings" are up for the grabs.

It is only the fixed income/salary earners like me whose dream of buying a dream home might still only remain a dream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I can only console myself .." Home is where the heart is"...

Trivia about Muh

2006-08-03T20:54:00.000+05:30

Blame HET for this!

Ten Top Trivia Tips about Uma!

Uma has little need for water and is capable of going for months without drinking at all!
Uma can sleep with one eye open!
Uma became extinct in England in 1486.
Uma is the largest of Saturn's moons!
South Australia was the first place to allow uma to stand for parliament.
California is the biggest exporter of uma in the world!
Uma is the world's smallest mammal.
Twenty-eight percent of Microsoft's employees are uma!
A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find uma.
Only one person in two billion will live to be uma.

Mole in the cheek!!, scar in the face!!

2006-08-02T21:55:00.000+05:30

One has heard of Witchhunt and Manhunt..but now we have this intense "Mole- hunt". The fact that people,out of limelight (read power), facing severe identity crisis can write just about anything in a "memoir" , "autobiography" or "reflections" to grab eyeballs is proved by the Jaswant Singh's latest tactic.

In his book 'A Call to Honour: In Service of an Emergent India', Jaswant Singh has alleged that a mole in the PMO during the time of late prime minister P.V. Narasimha Rao had leaked nuclear secrets to the US. This might definitely do some pre-release publicity for his book, but the same cannot be said for BJP!

His colleague Mr Das Munshi was at his wit's best: "We could have helped him find buyers and even honked to secure buyers for his book," he said, adding "it is a book-selling campaign unparalleled in history."

While Jassu still claims: "I have never used the word 'mole,' even in the book. However, it generated so much excitement and the prime minister charged me with lacking in decency..."

While BJP's already squirming over turmole caused by the deepening embarrasment, Jaswant Singh's claim that he was still waiting, apparently with little success, for a "call" from the PM to discuss the matter did not cut much ice either.

BJP is busy digging a hole to bury the mole,while Congress's is on a roll taking a dig at BJP's role.

Is is what they call making a mountain out of a mole? Are'nt there enough issues of national interest to focus on?

PS. Taking a cue from Jassu, looks like our Ex-India Cricket Coach John Wright is trying to bring lots of " dressing room" scenes out of the closet in his memoir. Censor Board probably might give an A certificate ?

and

Why do all the memoirs have to always be so bitter?

Face the Musick

2006-07-30T12:05:00.000+05:30

Audioslave's Chris Cornell, former frontman of Soundgarden, will record the theme song for the new James Bond film, "Casino Royale," which opens November...

Why??Coudn't the Brocollis find the usual ,mediocre, skin-exhibiting divas from the non-grunge world? Or is Chris Cornell finding alternative avenues for his quivering voice?

Lance Bass, member of the hit boy band N'sync has finally"come out".. He said "I knew that I was in this popular band and I had four other guys' careers in my hand, and I knew that if I ever acted on it or even said [I was gay], it would overpower everything.

Yeah, as such,the non existent N'sync has nothing to lose now that he has comeout with his sexual orientation, as all the females are following Justin Timberlake and his on-off & much older girlfriend Cameron Diaz.

Rolling stones have annouced plans for an extensive FALL tour throughout Canada & US.

Is this is what they call death defying tactics?, 'coz I dont see any of them fall, even after zillion years. BTW, I hear discounts for senior citizens..and special "wheel chair" personally autographed by Keith Richards.

Nicollette Sheridan, actress from Desperate Housewives is working with VH1 to help improve music education in American public schools.

Sheridan, who is currently engaged to singer Michael Bolton, has apaarently realised that this is the only way to save the sad state of american music, after hearing it straight from horse's mouth..

Thats enough food for the dying music fans to digest..

Typical language usages in Bureaucrazy!!!

2006-07-26T22:02:00.000+05:30

You dont need to analyse the finer nuances to understand bureaucratic language usages like these:

When they say ..................................They mean:
Hand overing / take overing of charge...........Handing / taking Over of charge
First all of.....................................................First of all
Defination.....................................................Definition
Many peoples including childrens.................Many people including children
N.A...............................................................Not Available
On Tour.........................................................On Leave
Kindly request your presence........................Request your kind presence
Respected Sir.................................................Hi !
Second only to................................................Bad/Poor
List is not exhaustive......................................Cant name more, Use your imagination
All are invited to come with their families........Don't bring neighbor or their family/ies
Snakes will follow.............................................Snacks will be served
Respond at your earliest.................................We don't care
Inconvenience caused is regretted...................You don't care
Information is correct to our Best of knowledge........Don't know
Customer service......................................................Dream goal
Merit certificate.................................................Every dog had its day
15 Minure recess................................................1 hour break
Meeting...............................................................Chit chat
Committee meeting.............................................Work
Presentation...........................................................Time out
We are fully Computerised.....................................We use wordstar and lotus
Inspection.....................................................................Getaway/Road Trip

Please feel free to add as many as you might've come across!!

Say No To Pirates..Review of POTC-II

2006-07-22T20:23:00.000+05:30

Horrible, Boring and a Total Waste of 150 minutes of your Life..

Gore Verbinsky should know that not every sequel can meet up to the expectations and standards set by the predecessor. Take Lord of the Rings Trilogy for e.g, or even the banal Terminator series.

Totally counting on digital effects and effaced images of *creatures* from the depths of the ocean, the sequel does not stir anything that could even distantly qualify as amazement. The special attratcion this time around was supposed to be Bill Nighy( Love Actually) playing the damned & tentacled "Captain Davy Jones" . But one felt quite shocked and almost cheated to see some Computer generated Octopus stuck on his face.

Millions of dollars wasted on a missed opportunity.

This movie could get labelled a success only on account of lack of competition or loyal followers of Mr Sparrow's antics.

Say No To PIRATES! Save your Life!

Printer's Devil

2006-07-22T10:23:00.001+05:30

I have always criticised "jounalistic activism" by the media. To secure oneupmanship in the burgeoning and cutthroat media market, (struggling) reporters/journalists breach all limits of ethics and conscience to report/publish some *exclusive* piece of news which is often obnoxious or even immaterial to he common man.

Sample this:

The cover page of Mumbai Mirror dated 20th July 2006 carried a huge and crisp photograph of a seemingly happy bridal couple. Aptly titled photofinish, the label below claimed that this was one the rare wedding pictures of "Junaid & Maharukh", children of famous personalities from across the border. This, being published first hand and exclusive after one whole year of secret and high profile event.

Readers could feast their eyes on the lively and smiling couple, but more on the bride bedecked with garlands of the yellow metal. So far so good.

Only today, on the cover page of the same daily the editor issues a "clarification" (in lieu of public apology) stating that the wedding picture was not that of the famous starchildren. Indeed, it belonged to one Mr E*-? from Chennai. While the editor profusely regretted the *embarassment* caused to Mr E*-? for inadvertantly showcasing his bridal wealth, the fact that this picture was blindly lifted by their reliable source( no more!) from some pakistani source was also accepted( sotto voce..)

So much for Oneupmanship, this is cheap and pitiable journalism, by the starchild of India's top newspaper..

Bloggers on the spot?

2006-07-16T15:24:00.000+05:30

Why am I not able to see any blogs at *.blogspot.com??
For the past two days, I can log on to blogger, edit and post blogs but cannot view my baby. I hear the same story from fellow bloggers across India. The Help group is flooded with crisis messages from all over India cutting across various ISPs but the problem is still under "trouble shooting" I presume even as I post this blog.

So far, no official statement from blogger or ISPs have been released. Till then, keep your fingers crossed or go for a *proxy*spot.

Hot n Yahoo ...Beta be good

2006-07-14T21:55:00.000+05:30

In a landmark deal of its kind, arch rivals Yahoo & Windows(MSN) Messenger have joined hands... The move is aimed to stymie Google's (G-Talk) rapid inroads into IM space.Is that what they call Mail Merge?

For the layperson, this BETA version allows Yahoo and MSN Internet Messenger(IM) users to chat with each other across both networks. This means the users need not have 2 IDs and 2 softwares to chat with users of respective IMs anymore. Together both these IMs would dominate in Indian Web by getting lions share of more than 70%.

"Interoperability between these two IMs will give users the ability to exchange instant messages, see contacts online, file sharing upto 1MB (on Yahoo Messenger), share select emoticons and connect with a global community of friends through one safe and secure IM experience," says George Zacharias, MD of Yahoo India.

Bless you, Competition.
Whats on your mind G?

Sounds of Thunder : Mumbai Blasts 11/7: Eyewitness Account

2006-07-11T22:27:00.000+05:30

I've not seen anything "burst" in front of my eyes except for "laxmi bombs" during Diwali . I have'nt heard anything louder than the pre-monsoon thunders. But I was unfortunate to witness both 0f these from a distance of hardly 50 Metres.

I and my colleague could not board the 6.15 pm Borivli fast from Bandra station, as ,due to the delay in the arrival of the train, the crowd had exceeded the capacity of the compartment. We could have chosen to hang by the footboard like we do on several other days, but I can only say that it was "divine intervention" which forbade usfrom doing that this time.

Seconds after the train left Bandra Platform No.4, we heard a deafening noise from the same direction, accompanied by smoke. This was followed by utter chaos with all the passengers running helter-skelter. Bandra is one of the "commercial areas" of mumbai and houses a lot of corporates, software companies , banks and call centers and this being the peak hour for homebound office goers, the timing of this heinous act could not be any more perfect. Many passengers started scrambling towards the train, which now stood halted at a distance, and started to save the injured passengers. Soon people from buildings adjoining the tracks joined in the efforts. It took a good 20 minutes till a strectcher was taken to the spot but all the while it was the fellow citizens who came with open arms for helping the injured. While all the Western railway services were halted, we had no options but to hit the roads. With all the buses overcrowded beyond question, many a rickshawallas/private vehicle owners were reaching out to stranded passengers to drop them at convenient locations. I reached home safely only because of one such kind Mumbaikar.

Mumbai is one of the safest cities for Ladies, ironically, living inMumbai has always meant living on the edge. But I'm sure that like always, resilient spirit of the Mumbai would sail us through troubles times, especially, acts of terrorism. This apart, the investigators should leave no stones unturned in nailing the culprits, thier aides and the abettors to this crime .

MUMBAI MERI JAAN!

Zidane is done

2006-07-10T22:48:00.000+05:30

My! Oh! My

The soccer world was aghast to see the repeated replays of the "head butt" incident involving Zizou and Materazzi. Why on earth would a man of Zizou's calibre and composure lose his head over something so incomprehensible and cause a nasty fowl, on such a momentous occasion as this - A WORLD CUP FINAL -His last world cup and international football appearance.

Such an ignominious exit from a glorious and glittering career !

He has still been awarded the "golden ball", but this won't console the hearts of millions of his fans.

Somebody STOP Them !

2006-07-09T12:56:00.000+05:30

Rafa Vs Fedex..Redux

It seems like these two are simply unstoppable, their rivalry spanning from court to court! One never bows down and the other never quits!! I was totally wrong in underestimating the power of Spanish matador. Seems like he took my challenge seriously. The leader and the challenger meet face to face for another battle at the Lawns of Wimbledon 2006.

The Swiss plays with watchful(pun intended) precision on all surfaces but the Spaniard's relentless fighting spirit had unnerved every opponent. Rafa has taken it upon himself to shed his cliched image of "King of Clay" by expanding his prowess over the green grass of Wimbledon. He has done it and How?

-By Reaching two Grandslam finals back to back, on two conflicting surfaces, facing The Numero Uno in both, beating him in one and aiming to beat in the other.

In the ATP Men's Rankings, there has always been this huge gap in terms of points and proficiency between the World No.1 and the No.2. But Fedex's "cruises" have met with rough and tough weather from "El Nino" more than once. Hence the gap between the two has narrowed greatly showcasing Tennis at its best. Way to go champions!

Struck a chord!!

2006-07-04T21:12:00.000+05:30

Literally!

Today, we folks were confined to the four walls of our humble homes as the rains decided take us one on one. I watched through the window as each drop of rain gathered into a confluence , converting the open stretch of playground adjacent to my home to a makeshift swimmimg pool!

Soon, came the ominous power cut and most parts of the island city got cut off from the civilized world. It seems that the BMC wanted to take no chance on "Short circuits" this time around and promptly ordered the power suppliers to cut the cords! Amidst landslides, open manholes and potholes, they've got thier priorities clear!

We were in the dark for a good 8 hours and 200mms of rain, with nothing to do indoors and hostile outdoors! So I picked up my Accoustic Guitar which was the only thing I could "play" without any power (pun intended). Grunge was the first choice,followed by some punk.

1. Territorial Pissings-Nirvana (Start with A and then with D)
2. Lounge Act-Nirvana( B)
3. On a plain-Nirvana (start with D and tried with E)
4. Heart Shaped Box-Nirvana ( Tried to start with all posible chords,but B sounded the best)
5. Plush-Stone Temple Pilots( E)
6. Here She comes now- Nirvana(A)
7. Sappy- Nirvana(D)
8. Basket Case- Greenday(D and G)
9. I'll stick around- Foo fighters(D and G)
10. Where did you sleep last night- Nirvana (E)

As it always happens,I struck the right chords when I don't have the recording set up . I played these songs over and over again in all sorting orders, as if there was no tomorrow.Probably that is when I struck the wrong chord, and my 1st string gave in. Or probably it was the rains.

Kurt Cobain always signed off his concerts by smashing his guitar(TM) onto the amps/drums. I just broke one string. Luckily, I had an extra set of strings ( rain check?), but didn't have a clue as to fixing it. I called up the Guitar technician to set the chord straight and pat came the reply..." Laws of physics".

I sure can't go back to eighth grade but with some common knowledge on tensity, supported by will and patience, I fixed the new string. By 7.30pm the the power supply resumed and I gave my guitar its well-deserved rest.

I turn on the TV and for once Blitzkrieg vs Azurris was in the prime spot ahead of the banal "Mumbai Rains".

The man who cried Wolf!!

2006-07-03T17:06:00.000+05:30

I am talking about all those hyper(active) news anchors and correspondents across the News channels who have gone overboard while reporting on Mumbai Rains since last three days. I've been in this city all my life and we folks are habituated to turn on the news at day break, specially in this season, to know about the latest news on weather, rain and traffic in the city.

I was in for a shrill shock to see these *latest updates* and *breaking news* flasing across the screen:
- all the subways are closed,
- all the trains have been cancelled or running late,
- all the main roads are waterlogged,
- all the highways are congested with traffic,
- very heavy rains forecast for next n no. of days.

These facts are also supported with LIVE *visuals* and *actual interviews* taken from urchins, pavement dwellers and pensioners (who have never had anything good to say about the civic authorities or the Govt). My parents, credulous folks they are, intensely dissuaded me from going to work. But I decided to go ahead and learn it the hard way!

Now Reality Check:
-There was no waterlogging,
-The trains were running and only slightly behind schedule
-I reached my office safely and on time.
-All my colleagues were also on time

While the fact remains that despite the lessons learned from the aftermath of 26/7, our Municipal corporation(BMC) has done nothing that could even remotely qualify as disaster management, these unscruplous TV channels have fully capitalised on the the people's fear psychology and BMC's inefficiency, to broadcast news whose authenticity cannot be verified.

On the way to my office, I was not really suprised to see derelict roads and relatively empty train compartments as many Mumbaikars might have stayed away from venturing outdoors, thanks to *latest news* on TV!!!!!!!!

Conundrum

2006-06-29T20:34:00.000+05:30

With the FIFA World Cup Fever and all, this one question has always been bugging me. What country in the world would have a scenario like this:

The National Game : Hockey
The Semi-National Hobby: Football
The National Passion: Cricket

We have'nt exactly "excelled" in any of these sports save for some duration in the gone generation. Well, I am not getting into any argument as to how cricket has always stolen everyelse's sunshine. But what I can understand is that there has been a palpable growth in the average Indian's appreiciation of other sports besides Cricket.

Thanks to multiplying satellite sport channels, now sport event in every nook(ad) and corner of the world gets instant and indepth coverage and all a sports fan needs is a flick of the button to switch from soap operas to sport arena! Now my assistant Mr Shinde (avid sports fan & amateur Sports commentator) discusses Ricky Paanting(sic) and Ranaldu(sic) with equal ease. FIFA worldcup is the talk of the town. He may not follow "offside" or "handball" but can surely understand when the "umpire" hands out pila or laal patta. He went on, drawing some interesting parallels between both these games!

The point Im trying to make is that Aam Aadmi is no more driven by cricket alone. Atleast a quarter of our country's populace can safely be called "manic football fans". And when Preity Zinta's secret football fetish occupies the frontpage of a leading newspaper, another quarter of the populace will blindly join this group! We hear Bengal is virtually dancing to Samba, rooting for Brazil, instead of Mohun Bagan for a change. The rest of India is simply content watching the event on TV or at Big-Screen Bars at best, cheering for countries not known otherwise..

This is the conundrum, the ubiquous Indian, and his conspicuous absence in the football arena.

No Rain

2006-06-26T15:40:00.000+05:30

The rains might be playing hide 'n seek with we folks in Mumbai knowing very well that the love-hate relationship between us can never end. We cringe on the onset of the monsoon, but we are fretful until it happens. As the mercury rises to newer heights each day, a dark cloud lurks round the corner playfully strike its "million watts smile' on the very folks..and then vanish into thin air, without shedding a single drop the pristine gem of life. Its always been Too much or Too little with the rains and so far the prospect of the latter appears ominous.

As I post these ramblings about the vagaries of monsoon, I remember one of Blind Melon's greatest songs:

"No Rain"
All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
I like watchin' the puddles gather rain
And all I can do is just pour some tea for two
and speak my point of view

But it's not sane, It's not sane

I just want some one to say to me
I'll always be there when you wake

Ya know I'd like to keep my cheeks dry today
So stay with me and I'll have it made

And I don't understand why I sleep all day
And I start to complain that there's no rain

And all I can do is read a book to stay awake
And it rips my life away, but it's a great escape

escape......escape......escape......

All I can say is that my life is pretty plain
ya don't like my point of view

ya think I'm insane
Its not sane......it's not sane

The Three "R"s

2006-06-18T22:50:00.000+05:30

One is very familiar with the Three "R"s governing Education- Reading, Writing and Arithmetic. But today, the term is so popular that virtually every field of knowledge under the sun has its own Three "R"s to catch the attention of the persons pursuing it to its core principles/themes. The Net threw up several such 3R's..some of which may be grossly deficient or at times perfunctory in their functioning as Tenets of their respective disciplines. Some of them are outright funny(!) too.

1. Modern Technology (satire): Railing, Writhing amd Recrimination(!)
2. Youth Protection(against abuse): Recognise, Resist and Report.
3. Conserveration: Reduce, Reuse and Recycle.
4. Against Animal testing: Refine, Reduce and Replace.
5. Parole Re-entry(into community): Risk, Resources and Results(!)

6.Money Management: Review, Revise and Retry(!) ( not good enough for stock market traders)

7.BehaviourManagement: Rules, Rituals and Routines ( is that all?)

8. Collective Bargaining: Raises, Rights and Respect(!) ( note that respect comes last)

9.Capital Budgeting: Resources, Revenue and Rate of Return
10 Drug Addicts recovery: Rehab, Revive and Revitalize

Also came across The Three Rs of Migraine Management, Logistic Consequences,System Dependability.......

Struggling and budding wannabes in various field coin their own Three Rs in thier dissertations/case studies/white papers..to summarize the ocean of knowledge to 3 vital R- words, knowing very well its inutility, except serving as catchy titles for facilitating reader recall ??

So I coin the Three Rs to sum up Life in Mumbai: Rails, Rains and Reels!!!. My soccer crazy neighbour immediately comes up with the Three Rs in the Field of Brazilian Football (pun intended): Ronaldo, Ronaldinho and Roberto Carlos..

With the lights out..

2006-06-14T23:25:00.000+05:30

Andheri, Mumbai's well known suburb on the west side, suffers from a more unwestern problem, if I may say so, .."Intermittent Power Outage". While the repetitive threats of the SEB for daily 20% power cuts in the Island city proved hoax, off late, the denizens of this suburb have been hit with sudden, frequent and unwarranted power cuts for intervals ranging anywhere between15 mins and 2 Hrs. This, when the mercury has risen over the roof and the monsoon is yet to vent its full fury..

What, with SoccerWC , cricket and tennis going on on the telly, the sport loving suburbia is simply caught unwares with the lights out !! On several occasions my chat sessions have abrubtly ended, to the dismay of the chatmates!

So much of this and now my shopping list looks like this:
UPS
Battery operated Fan
Emergency Light
Genset
Batteries

Mumbai never needed these even a year ago.

"..With the lights out, Its less dangerous
Here we are now, Entertain us"

from "Smells like teen spirit"
Kurt Cobain

So its the usual: Nadal Vs Fedex

2006-06-09T22:40:00.000+05:30

Its not suprising to see the World Number One Roger Federer pitted against the King of of clay Rafael Nadal at the French Open Mens Finals on Sunday, a replay of 2005 Roland Garros Semifinals .

Both are Europeans, but possess entirely different games. Fedex has this aggressive, fast and clinical approach to his game., while Rafa is patience, perseverence and hardwork glorified!Fedex is a thorough allrounder..like Bjorn Borg, while Rafa has conquered all the clay under the sun( literally! breaking records while winning more than 55 matches nonstop!!)

There is no denying of Rafa's impeccable & undisputable record against Fedex on clay, but, over the past few months,Fedex's game seems to have improved greatly, after all the claycourt warmups, especially against Rafa. So we hope this sunday will throw up a thriller of a match for us. Fedex wants this trophy to complete his GrandSlam Collection while Rafa will not want to put an end to his winning streak.

I'm not sure who the French crowd will be rooting for but my vote is for Federer Express!

Game; Set; Match, Roger Federer.

Hey Mr Nadal..Try and beat Fedex at Wimbledon, that is, if you show up..!

Vanishing Act

2006-06-04T20:54:00.000+05:30

A fews days back, 6 to be precise, I did a long overdue makeover to my blog. Overdue only because nearly all my peerblogs had undergone one or more. So I googled for a template in tune, with the blogground and the blogger's mind and landed upon this: magic paper, which was the perfect match.

I uploaded the template and my blog bore that magic look! I was even handed over some occasional words of praise from fellow bloggers. But, for the past three days, the template fails to load on uploading my blog. Though Im not a techie, I managed to somehow access the same site , I got this:
"The bandwidth limit for this site has been exceeded"

While the template still exists in my blog setings, it never gets uploaded and my blog presents a pretty plain background.

Can some bright mind decode this esoteric enigma to an exoteric riddle and enlighten the dim witted?

Also want a web tool to ward off evil eyes...

PS: HELP!!

Wednesday Wash Out!!

2006-05-31T21:06:00.000+05:30

Sights like these are not uncommon to Mumbaikars, specially after 26-7 deluge of last year. Since last evening Mumbai is under a cloud ...experiencing its first monsoon showers of the season ( or was it premonsoon?)which was actually scheduled to hit us from June 1, as per the local weathermen ( like we believed them).

While Mumbaikars always rejoiced the first showers, it did'nt appear to bring any such feeling this time around, what with just 2 hours of rain, all the main roads, junctions & subways were under several feet of water! It took over 2 hours for me to reach home from work today, for what is normally a Half hour travail. All this, on the first day of monsoon. Heavy rains Plus high tide always meant bad news for us.

While the BMC commisioner went on with is pre-monsoon manifestoes as usual..." We are 100% prepared" " All the drains have been desilted"...'All the roads have been repaired" blah blah .., it was the same old news for the average commuter..Our Police Commisioner went a step ahead, on the hitech mode, sending weather forecast sms to all the hassled denizens !Like they really care. Why ? Has he been given a lateral transfer to the MET Dept? Can't he send traffic updates instead? Bunch of Jokers everywhere.

It has been raining for the last 6 hours non-stop .So I turn on the TV to watch the news (hazy but audible s it happens during the rains) only to hear every reporter & commuter repeat my lamentations..

Dont want deluge, not even a de ja vu!

What 'ism" is this?

2006-05-30T21:03:00.000+05:30

We want to liberalise Indian economy ...and globalise it, when we can't liberate the Indian psychology from this age old "ism" that has dogged our society for centuries and even governs our polity. What else should we call this threat of reservationism that portends nothing but doom to our quest for scientific & technological wizardry in the new world??

Why are medical students and resident doctors striking for days? Why should they bother when they have already got their seats? Why is every IITian joining hands with these protestors who call themself "Youth for equality"? It is because they care for the future of the country which they are going to represent in thier professional capacity.

Youth for Equality is an initiative by Medical and other professional students in India who feel strongly against populist measures which can be wrong, unjust and harmful for India's future.

Their plea for "implementing Universal Free education" and "concession/quota for the economically backward" have fallen on deaf ears of the politicians. Not surprising that most of the Medical/Engg/MBA colleges are run by politicians!

If the government wishes to allocate quotas based on one's caste certificate in speciality disciplines such as medicine and other advances sciences, will such a fact be in mentioned prominentlyin the degree certificate ? For , the prospective user of such services might demand a "right to information" and further the usage of caste in certificate!, which cannot be ruled out or ruled as wrong!!

Populist measures are always welcome, insofaras they don't harm the cultural ethos. Caste based reservation without addressing issues like child labour, free education upto highshool, malnutrition, is an utter FARCE and EYEWASH.

Even as the Hon Supreme Court ordered these protesters today to call off the strike or face contempt charges, the movement only seems to have gathered further momentum. These are testing times for the Indian youth. Every concerned citizen of this country should come forward and voice thier opinion for "Equality through education" and against "Lack of quality through reservation" .

The DVC-Why you should not drool over the movie?

2006-05-29T17:32:00.000+05:30

If you have read the book and were awaiting the movie ...and watched it, you can't afford to simply drool over it, for:

1. If you were blown away by Paul Bettany's mindblowing potrayal of "Silas" you may be called a psychopath..

2.If you g0t carried away by the candid, simple & non-saucy performance by Tom Hanks, you'll be called a sycopant.

3.If you were impressed by Sir Ian Mckellen's excellent potrayal of the cagey villain, you will be told that you are suffering from a LOTR hangover..

4. If you felt Jean Reno was the right choice for Bezu Fache, you may be a called a Opus Dei sympathiser..

5.If you were mesmerised by the fantastic locations(real) and the eerie ecclesiastic backdrops, you might be even called a sciolistic artlover..

6. If you loved the movie, you will probably be branded as the anti-christ..

So I choose to keep my views to myself, in secrecy, lest I should be called any of the above. But ,I guess it has already been decoded !

Johnny Depp in "Aparichit"

2006-05-21T23:08:00.000+05:30

I have been seeing the posters hangin over every wall, on every newpaper in the last few weeks for a Hindi movie called "Aparichit", with a man so closely resembling Johny Depp in Don Juan de Marco.

With JD's ever growing repertoire in weird movies, I thought I might have missed on his latest Indian venture.I was just telling my mom that the day is not far when JD will be a household name in India when she quipped: "He is no Johnny Vonny. You are looking at the southern star Vikram".

A little later I was enlightened that this movie is a Hindi Dubbed version of the original 2005 tamil Blockbuster "Aniyar"(Stranger). I have'nt seen either of them, but I hear its an action/social/drama/thriller about a man [Vikram] who plays the character of a man with MPD- Multiple Personality Disorder(4 disorders to be precise), and takes it on himself to cleanse the corrupt filth in the society ! Now who would'nt wanna play that?

Gone are the days when Bollywood movies used be remade or dubbed with Southern flavour!

p.s: I might have been wrong to liken Vikram to Johnny Depp, but I'm dead sure Johhny Depp would do a good job in a hindi movie, with/out a dub!

Madame Tussaud's in my Ear

2006-05-17T22:23:00.000+05:30

Im dead right. If I was suffering from deafening pain in my aural appendage for the past month, it was not because of the high voltage noise from sloganeering medical students nor was it the blaring screams of Nirvana. I went to a ear-doctor ( not on strike) and he said I have nothing short of a wax museum in my right ear.

He asked me when was the last time I had wax removal , to which I said "Never". He made out that I havent flushed my ears for all my life. I had to apply some ear drops, smelling like pheneol 4 times a day (which means my collegues in office were not spared from its mordacious odour) for a week to grease the source and ease the pain! The flusing operation followed and succeded.

All's well that ends well.

Now I can certainly lend an ear to what you have to say!Eh?

Poll Pot Pourri

2006-05-08T20:43:00.000+05:30

The votes are cast and so the exit polls are out. Seems like Amma's AIADMK +MDMK alliance is gonna take beating, black and blue.Times Now-Hansa Exit Poll has projected just about 81 of the 234 Assembly seats for the ruling alliance,while DMK+PMK+INC+Commies alliance is expected to get 150. BJP is once again conspicuous by a total no show. Also looks like captain Vijakanth might have to return to his career on the celluloid!

While exit polls have never been exact, one cannot deny the true "Dravidian" electoral voting tradition-"decisive" and "anti incumbency".

As far as TN is concerned, Dynasty politics shall soon take over the driver's seat, with able guidance from Centre!

Also heard that "Budhha is smiling" in Kolkata.

Random Sampling Theory

2006-05-04T22:55:00.000+05:30

Random Sampling might work well for actuaries and statisticians but have always spelt doom for writers ( or copy writers shall we say?) . The Kaavya Viswanathan fiasco is a bright example of how plagiarism is viewed differently across faculties of art. Her claim to fame was thru her maiden book “How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild, and Got a Life" has apparently borrowed lines from author Megan McCafferty and from some others whose work she was very fond of as a child!

The Music and Movie Industry has alwways been rife with affront as well as soft version of copies/samplings from here and there that are easily passed of as "Inspiration". However while the audience of such samplers enjoy the results of outright lifting, the same audience shuns and ridicules a possibly budding writer.

While I have never read Kaavya's “How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild, and Got a Life", I have thought about writing " How Kaavya got Hitched, Sissed and Got no life", and I would not forget to print this warning on the cover: " Any Similarity in thoughts or words with any person/book would be purely unintentional or coincidental" in finer print and spare the rods!

Read This!

Pink Panther Review

2006-05-02T19:55:00.000+05:30

Pink Panther (2006) definitely does not deserve a big screen dekko. However, Peter Sellers, the legendary "Inspector Jacques Clouseau" of Pink Panther comedies of yesteryears has passed on the mantle to an apt and deserving candidate in the comic master Steve Martin.

The plot is based on a prequel to the 1964 Blake Edwards' classic with Peter Sellers.

While virtually everbody imitates franglish accent exceptionally well, Steve Martin's was freaking funny an left you in utter splits. Steve might me trying hard to fill the huge paw prints but he is definitely following the foot steps.

Besides the usual slapstick comedy, watch out for the witty wisecracks from Inspector Clouseau. Dont miss the scene where Inspector Clouseau tries to pick up American accent for " I would like to buy a ham-bur-ger" from an accent expert.

Its a Kick Ice Movie !

2006-04-24T21:02:00.000+05:30

Finally, I made it to the big screen to watch the spectacular animatronics(!) of the newly released ICE AGE -2 - The Meltdown . For one who was totally amazed by every bit of ICE AGE (2002), this sequel was long awaited but thoroughly satisfying.

While Manny (Ray Romano) , Sid( John Leguizamo) and Diego(Denis Leary) were back at their usual comical best, the inclusion of a new creature- possums- Crash & Eddie voiced by the whacky duo SeanWilliam Scott and Josh Peck was a real bonus. Ray Romano(of Everybody Loves Raymond fame), Denis Leary ( of I want my MTV fame) & SW Scott (known from American Pie & Dude Where's my car) displayed their pedigreed humour, in their distinct style. The comical confrontations and dialogues between these characters were very laughable!

Kudos to Queen Latifah for playing exceptionally well the mammoth who thinks its a possum! and as always the Scrat's antics left entire audience in splits.

I'm wishing for ICE AGE-3..The Blackhole! ( or whatever)

PS: 90% of the theatre audience was adults and 30+ ! Whoever said Indian audience craves for Hollywood ACTION movies..ICE AGE 2 really kicks ice!

Kurt , dead and in Top 3!

2006-04-23T18:18:00.000+05:30

Its been more than a decade since the Grunge God closed his eyes for eternity, and truly! God has his mysterious ways . Even today his lyrics (or anthems as we call it) touch the heart of millions, is vouched by the recent VH1 poll for the "Favourite Lyric". What more, this is the verdict of 13000 music lovers from UK, the land which has offlate prided itself of producing some of their own newage/ pop/rock acts( Coldplay, Embrace, Arctic monkeys to name a few)

Nirvana's "Smells like Teen Spirit" ranks third in poll, after U2's "One" and The Smith's "How soon is now". The ever starving grunge fans like me were injected with a fleeting dose of happiness just to know that the world still remembers Kurt Cobain's anthem masterpiece, long after his demise.

Since the mid nineties, The Rock world has witnessed plenty of one-song wonders, and where, shelf life of a rockstar has reduced to his lowest, and also where the critics & fans have written off musicians overnight!

Amidst all these the Grunge God survives.. for his true followers, his cult, worship him relentlessly and will never lose sight of his words.

Of Rice Wars and Telly Sets!

2006-04-22T13:02:00.000+05:30

The election fever is gripping every part of Tamilnadu and currently there is a head-on war of promises between the ruling AIADMK and their arch rival DMK. In the past, we have witnessed cold wars and cola wars but sample this:

The Democratic Progressive Alliance lead by DMK had announced the supply of rice for Rs 2/- kg, if voted to power. While the AIADMK initially quetioned the fiscal feasibility of this proposal, apparently bitten by the popularity of this scheme, has now pledged a much more cheaper package: Amma has promised to supply 10 kg rice for Rs 3.50 a kg and another 10 kg rice free thus offering rice for Rs 1.75 a kg. The opposition is now crying foul, alleging a violation of election code.

Earlier, in a truly one of its kind ways to woo the voters, the DMK pledged one colour Tv set in every household, " to provide a recreation and general knowlege mechanism for the tired farmer to relax after a hard day's work" and watch SUN TV, a network owned by the partymen who also own the majority of the cable networks that trasmit them. The Tv will definitely not provide this piece of knowlege though: that the Present Value of the future(& unending) inflows of cable rental is much more than the cost of an low end Akai or Aiwa 20'Inch CTV.

All in all, nobody cares about poverty, hunger, female infanticides or foeticides anymore...Its all about dominating airwaves, and capturing BPO marketshare! But one thing is for sure ..A poor ration card holder could have never had better!

Having Steamed rice while watching Sun TV at home ..shall no longer a dream be!

Had a Good Night , thanks to Good Luck!

2006-04-18T21:09:00.000+05:30

So my movie watching binge continued but suddenly sprang a surprise for me yesternight in "Good night, and Good luck". Altlast, I can safely say that the horrible weekend blues from last Saturday that seemed neverending has positively ended!

David Straithairn gave a powerful, mindblowing and incisive potrayal of 'Edward Murrow", the renowed reporter(of CBS) of the 40s& 50s, who is supposed to have pioneered modern day broadcast jounalism, especially the coverage of wars and issues affecting American civil liberties. Excellent performances from the support cast backed by a powerful screenplay secured this movie 6 oscar nominations this year. I always liked Grant Heslov as an actor, ever since "Faisil" in TrueLies but now, his screenwriting skills are starting to grab serious attention. Probably that's why he has frequently collaborated George Clooney in his production ventures.

This movie is all about Murrow taking on Mccarthy,more like Man vs Mammoth. Murrow's investigative reporting exposes Senator Joe Mccarthy's undemocratic and often victimising tactics on the supposed "communist sympathisers " that directly lead to Senate hearings which caused McCarthy's censure.

This movie, entirely B&W, may not appeal to all english audiences but is a pleasant change from all the other Oscar nominations.

Indian broadcast media can learn a thing or two about responsible jounalism from this movie.

The nail in the coffin..for the worst weekend ever..

2006-04-17T20:35:00.000+05:30

The weekend began with a horrible choice of movie for Friday night horror ..and then I had a gastronomist's nightmare in Saturday night feast from the east. Then came the last straw..watching the oscar winner "Capote"..on sunday to sum up my perfect weekend gone wrong.

When your beloved cousin and movie buff from far and away extols the performance of Philip Seymour Hoffman (the same guy whose performance in The Talented Mr Ripley(1999) raised eyebrows all around!) in her top ranked blog you simply dont want to be left behind. So here I was, in front of my TV eagerly awaiting "Sandra Bullock" on screen playing the famous Nelle Harper Lee, as the blog read.

You can forgive Capote's nasal alabama accent & forget Sandra Bullock ( for the role was played by Catherine Keener, Oscar nominated for the same ) , but simply can't follow why something like this was made into a movie when the subject matter of the movie - his book "In cold blood" was neither the first nor the best non-fiction that he ever wrote. It was only befitting that PS Hoffman played the gay, reclusive & eccentric Capote with that beautiful lisping voice of his! Not surprising he got nominated and rewarded with the Oscar, going by the kind odd & offbeat themes that draw attention these days!

My cousin is only thanking God that she is far & away......from me.

Help me! , Chan Hew !!

2006-04-16T21:12:00.000+05:30

'Look Before you Leap'
..One should think carefully about the possible results or consequences before doing something.

Why not rephrase this famous idiom to guide the unguided epicureans and gastronomists like me, somewhat like this:

" Taste before you Waste", or maybe,
" Sip before you gulp"

A total vegetarian, who freaks out on pasta & cheese and hates anything with coconut, chilli, groundnut or garlic, should find absolutely no place in "THAI BAN"(even if half the place is empty on a weekend!)

Lessons learned:

1.Thai food is not for everyone.
2.Cocunut milk , garlic & crushed groundnut form the paste or gravy for almost all the thai recipes.
3. For something that looks like a liquefied version of our own desi "aviyal" you dont have to call it "Kaeng phak", pay through the nose and still end up hungry (and finally attain satiety within the 4 walls of your home, from the delicious food made by your own Thai (mother)!)
4.Thai food is not for everyone.

One bite and forever bitter!

P.S:
"Chan Hew" in Thai means " Im Hungry"

The History of Silence

2006-04-16T18:43:00.000+05:30

This is what you will precisely learn after going through the pain of watching this latest offering from David Cronenberg, also known as the King of Venereal Horror. The History of Violence might not necessarily rank even a 5 on Mr Cronenberg's horror scale of 1 -10. Nevertheless, it manages to retire you into a state of eerie silence, as you wonder why you chose to spend your Saturday night amidst shotguns,smut and screams on the first place when anything else on earth would have proved better.

Well.. I had my own reasons! Its been long since the one and only Aragorn of the LOTR trilogy- Viggo Mortensen had played lead in any movie and I did not want to miss that. Secondly, a fellow aragorn-buff who also happened to be a good friend of mine until I watched this movie, suggested this as a psycho thriller. I was swayed by the above mentioned facts and in the process I totally forgot to read between the lines... "MPAA: Rated R for strong brutal violence, graphic sexuality, nudity, language and some drug use". For someone who cant tolerate a drop of fake blood on screen, this movie was like Munich & Basic instinct rolled into one. Definitely not my cup of tea. And as far as Viggo is concerned, he has made his statement clear.." He look!, I can fight the sword and pull the trigger with same ease" .

I'm not leading you thru the plot or the cast. Silence is golden.

Hey Aragorn..thanks!! but no thanks!!!

"The buck stops here"

2006-04-14T19:11:00.000+05:30

Salman Khan saw that signboard and made a pittstop for the black buck during his hunting expedition in the pink city way back in 1998. Rajastan has always been a hunting ground for the tourists, not to mention celebrities from the world of cinema and sports. Tiger pataudi & his hunt club were also accused of killing a black buck in a "Wild Life Santuctuary last year, what with the carcass recovered from his Gypsy.

Sallu has always maintained his Bad Boy image outside the Film industry....Poaching, Hit & Run, Stalking ex-beaus, inebriated phone calls..

What suprised everyone was that the Court handed down one of the stiffest verdicts - RI for 5 years for poaching of protected species of animals, while still not convicted for the midnight manslaughter on wheels that he committed 4 years back. So while his loyalists and moviemakers (who have signed him and currently burning their fingers from both the ends) question the harshness of court's verdict, the common man knows his nemesis was long overdue!

Now out on a bail, he is supposed to have told the press that the prision conditions were awful and was no way like in the movies, this, after spending only 3 nights with royal treatment.Apparently, none of his family or friends ever told this enfantre terrible that real life killing leads you behind real life bars! Get out of the Dream World, boy!! and guide the next in line....

Lyrics that blow me away

2006-04-11T11:52:00.000+05:30

I can't deny that I love every bit of Kurt Cobain's song writing. But , I also have a few of my personal favorites from
certain other rock / alternative bands. Its generally the lyrics with melancholic imprints and that absorb me. Probably
the result of grunge excess, I try to extract grunge from other genres!

1. " Nothing Else Matters" by Metallica
2. " King of Pain" by Sting/Police
3. " Like a stone"by Audio Slave
4. " Reason" by Hoobastank
5. "In the End" by Linkin' Park
6. "Down Incognito" by Winger
7. " Enjoy the silence" by Depeche Mode
8. " The day I tried to live" by Soundgarden
9. "Only happy when it rains" by Garbage

This one in particular , is a great one from Dave Pirner:

Soul Asylum's "Misery" :

They say misery loves company
We could start a company and make misery

"Frustrated, incorporated"
Well I know just what you need
I might just have the thing
I know what you’d pay to see

Put me out of my misery
I’d do it for you, would you do it for me
We will always be busy making misery

We could build a factory and make misery
We’ll create the cure; we made the disease

"Frustrated, incorporated"
"Frustrated, incorporated"
Well I know just what you need
I might just have the thing
I know what you’d pay to feel

Put me out of my misery
All you suicide kings and you drama queens
Forever after happily, making misery

Did you satisfy your greed,
Get what you need
Was it only envy, so empty

Frustrated, incorporated
Frustrated, incorporated

put me out of my misery
I’d do it for you, would you do it for me
forever after happily (forever left in half-belief)
making misery

Moonlighting or what?

2006-04-08T23:41:00.000+05:30

Heard an awful lot about moonlighting..but was totally taken aback by this one. Some days back, I read in a local tabloid that a female student of hotel management, from a middle class family was part-timing as a shoe shine girl at Bandra Railway Station. What more, she had no expertise of shining shoes and did nor possess a valid licence to operate off the station platform.

She did this not for a few bucks more or for personifying women's lib but for the sheer thrill of it.And I thought "Out-of -the-box Thinking" was the domian of the esoteric intelligentsia.

Its a different matter that she was forced out of this job by cops as she was "drawing much too attention" and "causing public nuisance".

Return of the Jackal...

2006-04-08T22:59:00.000+05:30

Reservation- Noun
"The act of reserving (a place or passage) or engaging the services of (a person or group)".The written record or promise of an arrangement by which accommodations are secured in advance.

Synonymous with:
Insecurities
Doubts
Incertitudes
Dubiousness
Questions
Qualifications
Flip Sides
Arrière pensée

All these thoughts are provoked by the recent statemets of the HRD Minister which portend the return of mediocrity in our Education Institutions, some of which have risen in status into top 10 of the world.
I join many a Indian youth who have come together to raise their voice against the Mandal Redux. Sample this.

What a day

2006-04-02T17:21:00.000+05:30

Sunday is supposed to be the rest day for the denizens of the working world. I have a 5-day week so the weekend mood sets in pretty early..Friday afternoon to be precise.The weekend hangover lasts till Monday afternoon or 5 doses of tea from the office-pantry, whichever happens earlier.

While saturdays are demarcated as "home-work" day, Sunday is the true off-day! "Sun" day which is equivalent to "Ravi" war in hindustani probably meant respite from the sun or a day on which you could take a sun-bath and get youself a tan. Either ways one is not supposed to exert energy or extract labour for the human body needs a break from routine.However, all this never applied to the traditional housewife,mind you.(Forming 50% of our population, she works all day, on all days and yet is not considered a part of our GDP simply because its non -remunerative or unquantifyable? How ironic ,for selfless service!)

The point I wanted to make was that I violated this cardinal rule today-a sunday and faced the music. Instead of lazing around in my Ezeechair,I went around the house gathering things to discard, much to the annoyance of "the others" in the house. This is because there is a huge generation gap between us in arriving at what items to weed out. I belong to a generation which believes that nothing is older than yesterday' newspaper while the others believe in "old is gold". We arrived at a certain amount of consensus waste and made the day for our raddiwala. I added more room to my balcony by discarding all the cardboard boxes of 29 ich TV, AC et al the others were diligently trying to preserve.

Overjoyed, I went on a cleaning spree and my hyperactive self soon reached the pinnacle when I accidentally broke my ten year old vacuum cleaner into million pieces ( a.l.a Gimli,the son of Gloin's ax at the fellowship meeting). The others might attribute this to work evasion technique for the weeks to come, but I take it as another junk out of the house! Of course, I had to face the animated animadversion for an hour but did I ever care?

P.s: This post has nothing to do with the others.

Different Take

2006-03-26T10:01:00.000+05:30

Main News:
Several Ministers have resigned their State/Parliament membership to show "solidarity" with Sonia Gandhi....
( These ministers might never resign when implicated in a crime or a scam! Sonia is like the " Lordess of the Ring"...One ring that rules them all.One ring that binds them!..Some ministers quit because they were holding offices of profit..Dont they all? They all clamour for Ministries beacuse they want to hold these offices for profit )

In other News:
Newzealand's iconic birds - Kiwi & Kakapo are being vaccinated against H5N1(Bird-Flu)....
(These FLIGHTLESS birds have no threat of getting infected unless from Humans( or may be Aliens!!))

International News:
French Prez Chirac walked out of a EU summit as a fellow frenchman addressed in "English" and returned after the address...
( Which means listened the entire speech from the lobby or went for a bathroom break..How the hell he knew when to join back?)

In a report, US has accused China for failing to release details about its military build-up programmes..
( Duh ! Are they actually expecting the same WMD report they released on Iraq?..They cant even get search results from yahoo or google!)

Melange:
Young women out-drink men in Britain...
(Good looking men with proper denture are hard to come by..Or else why on earth Daniel Craig(who?) was chosen to play James Bond ?)

Entertainment:
In an interview Viggo Mortensen was asked which was more difficult : fight scenes or sex scenes in "History of Violence"?..
( With so much fake blood, fake gun, SFX and stuntmen around, is so hard to comprehend!)

Sports:
Sachin goes to London for Surgery...
(When BCCI sponsors the trip and pays the bills without taking any guarentee on runs, who really cares?")

Final thoughts:
Baba Ramdev has been appointed as the Brand Ambassador of the State of Bihar...
(I can only say that this one is beter than the self appointed predecessor)

As I read the newspaper ,each day, my interest wanes, just looking at the headlines and cover stories .It makes me ponder where the world is headed...

Crash and Burn

2006-03-23T21:10:00.000+05:30

Okay, Crash was the only oscar nominated film I ever intended to watch this year. Its not important whether I support modern( read cliched) themes depicted in Brokeback mountain because I had enough of "pro-choice" potrayed in the Colin farell starring 2004 disaster "Alexander"..

Last night I got Crash DVD (finally!) and was hoping to have an oscar of a night. But midway thru the movie all I wanted to to do was to crash into my bed. "Boring" would be an understatement. I can't tolerate Matt dillon molesting Thandie Newton nor can I bear the sight of funnyman Brendan Fraser playing a DA! Total personality mismatch..Of course, in the end, you cannot stop feeling that when it comes to colour/racial discrimination, our society is much better off today compared to Uncle Sam's.

The tagline for the movie goes like this "You think you know who you are. You have no idea." I fully agree with the second part..I really have no idea why I bought this DVD! Movies like these get nominated because its much too vague and pointless for anybody's comprehension.

After all this I am eager to watch Brokeback Mountain ( So what?) and I dont feel sorry for myself. For fellow Johnny Depp Fans though there is good news: POTC -II trailer is here.
I hope one of you will return favours with the trailer of National Treasure II ( IF and ONLY IF there's Sean Bean in it)

Ps: BTW if you a true oo7 fan, join the world wide forum against the "Chosen One". Not only has this bloke abandoned the legendary JB tux in the new movie but also agreed to do a full frontal with the JB girl. Apparently this his only chance to give or take one..Eeeeuwww! I cant stand this guy after his watching him in "Munich". I can understand the desperate choices available from the the Island of the Queen. Really, good looking men with proper denture are hard to come by there!

The Best things in life are always...

2006-03-19T11:59:00.000+05:30

I've not completed the title because I'm confused as to what follows.

Some of the world's greatest pop-music stars have chanted this phrase in their songs and struck gold . Janet Jackson, one-time queen of pop topped the Billboard chart in 1992 for "The Best things in life are free". Madonna incorporates these words in the lyrics of her song " It used to be my playground".

There has also been a movie and a book released by the same title. I've never seen or read these but the point is :

What are these best things in life?
Who decides that?
How are they " Free"?

Lets say "happiness" is one of the best things in life. Everybody wants to be happy. But how is it free? One has to sacrifice something in cash or kind to achieve it. There is no gain without pain. There has not been single Management- Labour dialogue without the HR Honcho convincing us with " There is no Free Lunch" concept. In fact,for most lesser privileged women, unconditional affection from your husband has always come at a cost - Dowry. Many newly weds have attained peace of mind only after accommodating their senile parents in costly old-age homes!

I recently travelled in one of the low-cost airlines that have flooded the Indian skies in recent years. As the fare did not include inflight food( and even water!), we chose to simply carry our empty tummies on air. However,as my ears were getting clogged due to the cabin pressure, I reached out to the perky,smart hostess for some cotton balls to which she curtly said that they don't serve cotton balls on the plane!

Serve cotton balls? Was it ever apart of their Menu? Its not like I'm asking for candy floss! If they don't have them on the plane, where else ? I might even pay for them but where do I get them?

Talk about best things in life and I cant even get a pair of cotton balls!

My ears are still clogged, my hearing imbalanced..but my mind is very clear!

Everything Changes...

2006-03-14T08:56:00.000+05:30

Everything Changes..
Yeah..In various contexts...

So I've not posted anything for over 2 weeks. In fact I've not even accessed my blog. Well today, far away from my home , in Chennai, when I thought I'll restore my contact with the sane and free web world, all the enthusiasm died down in an instant when I saw my small space invaded by repetitive and smutty spam. These spammers are ever watchful..they attack you at a blink of an eye! Im totally tired of deleting each one of them. I hope the word verification software works.

I'm in Chennai ..my native land and having a whale of a good time. I feel I'm like those ABCDs who go on a "Discover India" expedition to find their roots!. I ve been in Mumbai all my life and everything here appears bigger, better, nicer and cheaper! Allow me to explain:

Firstly, for a late-riser like me I get a lot of extra time in the morning due to time zone. 6.30 a.m here resembles 8.00 a.m in Mumbai. So I get a straight 1 1/2 hours up-front
and believe me thats a lot!

Secondly all the conveniences are available within a radius of 50 metres. By conveniences, I mean library/DVD rentals/Malls/ Eating Joints et al. Most of them deliver at home and hence you dont have to bother going out in the hot sun.

Thirdly, everything costs at atleast appears to cost lesser compared to Mumbai. Say, travelling an equivalent distance of Andheri to Bandra here costs just Rs 3/- in the citybus as against Rs 8/- (and rising) in Mumbai. Public transport has always been a lot cheaper in Chennai despite no difference in fuel cost. Nevertheless, the surly bus conductors here are no match to the smart "BEST' conductors. The conductors here hardly ever move from the seat "reserved" for them hence the passengers crowd around him for getting their tickets, where as in Mumbai the conductors stride up and down the deck,virtually hunt you down and thrust the ticket in your palms!

Also, proximity to Bangalore(or is it Bengalooru?) has enabled availability of all kinds of fresh vegetables and fruits, some of which are hard to come by in my city.Plus they come really cheap..like a kilo of tomatoes cost Rs-4/-. A Kilo of most of the vegetables cost Rs10/- or less. Its like watching "Ripley's believe it or not". Our good hosts here ensured we get a taste of all that we miss in Mumbai and a foodie like me could not thank them more.

This list could go on and on..

- Water of the tap
-No power cuts
-Spit free roads and platforms.....

But let me make the best of the time in my home town..I have places to go and faces to see..

Thank God Mr PC...

2006-03-01T08:17:00.000+05:30

Yesterday Mr PC presented the Budget for 2006-07 in the parliament..in his inimitable style interspersed with some words of wisdom from his favorite knowledge Bank-- The Thirukkural.

For the aam aadmi Ive got some words of wisdom too:

The budget is a boon for these set of people:
Plagiarists: DVD / Combo drives drives cheaper
Soft drinkers: Cheaper ( of course, quality could'nt go any more cheaper than this!)
Wanabe car owners: Small Car segment cheaper
Cancer/Aids Patients: Cheaper imported drugs
Barefoot walkers/ Shoe-maniacs: Cheaper footwear
Every tax payer(2% of population): No change in tax rates or no new imposition of surcharges/cess ( tax by any other name pricks the same)

The budget is the exact opposite of boon for these set of people:
PCGamefreaks: Software gamesand other packaged software costlier
Smokers: Cigarettes costlier ( as usual)
Chain smokers: What do you care?
Barefoot walkers/shoe maniacs: Footwear cheaper
Active stock market players: STT up by 25% (whoa!)
Mobile/aam janata: 2% hike in Service tax for all services including your mobile bills.

Overall, its a thumbs down for this budget..Many expectations of the public were not met. Not too many incentive for infrastrucuture. No reduction in tax rates. Subsidies were left untouched. In short, no difficult and politically sensitive announcements were made. Several new services have been brought in to the service tax dragnet but the hike in service tax from 10 to 12% was ridiculous.

The day is not far when you will be arguing with your neighbourly kiranawala, istriwala or even dudhwala for overcharging......................... for SERVICE tax!
Till then...

Oscar Fever

2006-02-26T12:18:00.000+05:30

Oscar fever is taking over bird flu...till the results are let out on March 5th. While I dont exactly agree with all the choices that have made it to the nomination list.. I am really dissapointed that most of these movies have not yet been released in India. Take alook at some of the nominations we coud'nt treat our eyes with so far:

Brokeback Mountain( For Best Film)
Good Night and good Luck ( For Best Film/Lead Actor)
Munich ( For Best Film)
Hustle & Flow ( For Best Lead actor)
Syriana (For Best Supporting Lead actor)
North Country ( For Best Lead Actress)

It is a fact that more and more Hollywood movies have been releasing almost simultaneously in this part of the world, which.once upon a time could happen only in your dreams. However towards the end of the calendar year, local distributors choose to wait for the oscar nominations for releasing movies that make headlines. An " Oscar Nomination" obviosly earns the movie a brownie point and helps draw more crowds especially away from Bollywood movies, which is a not an easy proposition at all times.

I'm eagerly waiting for the release of "Munich" (everybody's raving about Eric Bana's tremendous performance) and "North Country"( for Charlize Theron and Sean Bean, of course!)

Consecretion or Desecration ???

2006-02-23T22:53:00.000+05:30

Out of the blue, I decided to pay a vist (and my respects) to a Devi temple consectrated last week by a well-known Seer of national stature . Many, like me, was thronging to get a glimpse of the deity of the all-powerful-goddess but was utterly shocked and even outraged to see the closed doors of the temple. It was around 5.00pm and it is supposed to be "peak hours" for these places of worship. On persistent questioning , one of the priests gave away something he couldnt keep long " The Seer who consecrated the temple is actually (resting) within the temple"..

Why would a Seer of national fame seek accommodation in a temple and commit sacrilege..Can the sanctity of the sanctum-sanctorum be put at stake ? Why not stay in the endless condominiums/mutts/dorms etc. that were bustling in the same precinct ?

These days all these sadhu-sants are under tremendous media scan..Many of them are fighting chargesheets, court cases and even uprsings from the Commies...What better place to hide from the eyes of the spies than within the temple?? safe from spycams, media and the public.. But one thing is for sure...You can never hide from GOD(literally!)..can you?

I had to wait long barefooted on the floors scorching under the afternoon heat till the Seer emerged out of the temple ...in the company of a troubled famed politician seeking his blessings for rejuvinating his sagging career!

Holding temple at ransom? I really felt sorry FOR GOD's SAKE, for once!

All's well that ends well..

Giggle and Wriggle

2006-02-20T22:07:00.000+05:30

The Greatest Search Engine?
You were an American Icon....till the day you sold yourself to something that contradicts what you are and what you believed in? FREEDOM...Just to add billion new accounts? Just to jump into the bandwagon?
You suck and I speak for a billion!

Down in the hole

2006-02-20T21:44:00.000+05:30

The past week was a horrendous 7 days for me. Consecutive late sittings at work wreaked havoc on my back leaving virtually no time or spine free for my fav passtime. I also added to this misery by upsetting my tummy royally..Its always a risk when you eat your own cooking. A mild flu was the cherry in the pie. I used to feed a crow of f my kitchen regularly and so I got paranoid about Bird flu ! Well ..when ur health goes out of order..your sanity hangs by a thread...your head goes for a toss..you become delerious.I heard that My cousin blogger was also down with a viral.But she was better off--bunking boring mechanical lectures and watching TV at home!

That was the the week that was.. Today when I was just planning on starting a healthy new week, my good-old fellow blogger reminds me of a dear departed's B'day..My mind is down in the hole...again...

Tagged and Jagged

2006-02-12T14:58:00.000+05:30

- Creep aka Bhanuj tagged me.

He enlightened me: "And a tag means you have to fill out that list... fast... so tell us what the soundtrack to your life would be..."
I like a fool, filled out my life on his blog..He lols at me and asks me to put it in my blog..

Hey Creep, You are the boss and your wish is my command. I dont have any mushy song taking over any part of my life.. Grunge rules me, rules over me.

And I reproduce what I meant:

This album of FNM sums up my life as I see it.
King for a day, Fool for a lifetime!
Opening Credits- "Junkyard" - Nirvana
Average day scene: "Man in the box" by AIC
Mental status: "In bloom" -Nirvana
Falling in Love Scene: " Swap Meet"- Nirvana
Heart break Scene: "Aneurysm"- Nirvana
Death Scene: Come on Death- Nirvana
Closing Credits - "All apologies" - Nirvana

I know I need therapy(pun intended..can u tell me what it is Mr creep?)

Simon says..

2006-02-11T21:48:00.000+05:30

I Hate to Be Rude, But... Simon Cowell's Book of Nasty Comments (2006, UK)

I really really want to read this book. I cant get enough of his nasty, acerbic and corrosive remarks (read judgements) that have left many an American Idol contestant in utter bitterness,not to mention tears.

Many like me admire him for the sheer & blunt honesty and a touch of brutality never killed anybody.His criticisms are more controversial than constructive and he cares not for the consequences..His potshots have become part of the show's trademark, but this season has some people wondering and worrying that his putdowns and humiliations are getting out of hand and setting a bad example for teenagers. The Whole of America hates him as they wonder why a Brit should be judging their music skills in the first place. This love hate relationship has unfolded one of the biggest success in the reality television. The american idol as well as Simon have become overnight stars for different reasons..

Simon says:

"If your lifeguard duties were as good as your singing, a lot of people would be drowning.."

If you would be singing like this two thousand years ago, people would have stoned you.

I'd make plastic surgery compulsory for every women over 40.

[on N Sync]
It would be true to say that two of them are really ugly."

I love this guy !

I just called...to say.....Its real CHEAP!!!

2006-02-10T20:55:00.000+05:30

Our Telecom Minister is taking the Cell Cos and net Phones for a head On!! It was announced today that starting March 1, you can talk to your distant cousin ( pun intended) in any corner of India with a One-Rupee Sikka in your hand. Had it been April 1, I would have passed it for a April Fool Joke.While the modalities are awaited, it would be miracle if those red piggy back pay phones in your Kirana shop could help you mend your bond with the distance in relationships! STD till a few years back dreaded for its high cost. (Today, its still dreaded, albeit for different reasons). 1-rupee STD call is almost a reality... a fortnight away.

With the advent of cheap cell phones & prepaid schemes, parents are increasingly worried about excessive phone conversations their children indulge in. I guess this news is no breather...

Rationalisation of calling rates across the board was always a long pursued and long pending issue in the Govt Controlled basic telecom sector but they should concentate more on increasing the telephone penetration (basic) in rural areas. We are way behind in comparison to developed countries as also some developing counties. All the statistical achievements of the past decade was predominantly due to GSM/CDMA phone penetration.

Well then...I think its the last nail in the coffin as far as snail mail( India Post) is concerned... It was already dying a slow death. Even a simpleton would realise now that its cheaper to call than to write ( not recommended all times!)

Talk on!

Saffron saga

2006-02-09T22:57:00.000+05:30

So I went to a " Culture Exhibition" featuring the original and pristine products made by our crafty Kashmiri artisan. Commuting from Andheri West to Powai (East) is no simple task..Its more like an excursion as in Mumbai. Travelling from West to east, across those railway tracks is more like travelling back in time....for 2 hours..

Saffron ( Saffron Crocus) is well known for its aromatic & coloring properties besides its medicinal values and is an integral part of Indian Sweetmeats and desserts. In fact every Indian would hold it closer to his heart than his mouth as its forms the brightest part of the tricolor!. The Saffron grown in the Sylvan settings of Kashmir has its own glory. A tiny box priced at a whopping Rs 90/- for one Gram of this herb could tell you that. Looking for a bargain, I pointed to a slightly bigger box of 5 Grams ( of the size of a matchbox) and pat came a reply from the culture vulture that took me by total surprise..

Rs 455/-

I was never good atmath but any sane consumer would look for somethin more like 400 bucks. Who would have thought that " The law of economies of scale" had no exceptions..
When I reasoned with him on this gross miscalculation he hesitantly said that the product will have to be sent back to the warehouse ( where? Kargil?) for price clarification/reprinting if any an will be available tomorrow. He probably forgot that it was already the last day of the exhibition!

He could extend it but I ain't goin back there. Ill rather go to Kashmir!

I returned home with that Big Brown Bag full of unwanted shopping I did to get my spirits up and just to kill the time and money I saved ( or did I ?) from the Saffron Saga. Whoever said that Consumer is the King? ...King for a day, Fool for a lifetime!

Accoustic Pissings

2006-02-07T21:28:00.000+05:30

I entirely forgot to tell ye all of the latest addition to my music room....A Brand new SemiAccoustic Guitar (Imported Granada, costing just over 5k)!! Well! I broke my first guitar (Definitely not the kurt cobain way!). The bridge had given away due to wear and tear and for the past six months I had to console my music urges by just listening to those chords.

I had to strum my way thru 15 different guitars to zero on this one. In fact I guess I was the first and last customer at LM Furtado's that evening! The guide there was of great help.He patiently played several of them( albeit the same chords) over and over again to help me choose the right one.I got a good deal though..For all of 5Ks I got a lovely full length guitar, a case, a beginners book( I did'nt need that though), a complete set of strings, cord for amplifier, a belt, and not to forget a cool T shirt!

Kurt Cobain has always been my inspiration. Repeat airing of "Come as you are " and " Lithium" had drawn me into Rock Music in general and Grunge in Specific. SLTR was like an anthem!. Since I learned playing the Guitar in DIY mode, I am no compares to KC, but can strum along for most of his compositions. I could have certainly replaced Pat Smear playing Rhythm on the Unplugged!

Today I relished and sunk into the accoustic version I generated for "Territorial Pissings". It has only 3 chords(A7 , F & D) and sounds mesmerising if the chords are played slowly and fully. Of course, Unlike the chords, Kurt's lyrics were never as decipherable and that left a great room for interpretation or imagination. But it always had some underlying and eternal truths...like this one:

"..Never met a wise man....
If so.. Its a Woman..."
From Territorial Pisings, Album - Nervermind, 1992.

Kurt Cobain (1967-1994)
RIP

Flight Plan Review-2

2006-02-05T19:12:00.000+05:30

You want a taste of Post 9/11 nightmare of a trans-atlantic air travel to USA??? Just Watch FLIGHTPLAN....from the crafty Brian Grazer( acclaimed for Apollo 13, A Beautiful Mind...). Though not officially released in theaters in India, the movie is now available on VCD/DVD.
Well, I know that a crazy Sean Bean fan like myself would not write anything bad about a movie starring him, especially in one of the lead roles..Captian Rich. Nevertheless, right from the start till the last scene, the screenplay was gripping with some shrills here and there. Jodie Foster ( long time no see) played a mixture of emotions in a depressed, grieving, widowed aircraft engineer and desperate mother perfectly.

What I hated the most was that the hijacker's ( conspiring US Air marshall) part was played by Peter Sarsgaard(who?& why?) in place of the ace veteran of all modern day baddies Sean Bean..How on earth was a mushy looking nextdoor neighbour kinda guy cast as the cheesy (anti)hero in place of a professional badman ? The directors have apparently not seen him in Goldeneye, Patriot Games, Don't say a word. In the US, Sean Bean shot to fame only as the Irish terrorist "Sean Miller" in Patriot Games. He being cast as a hands-tied captain of an unknown airlines was an insult to his intelligence, persona and everything he earned all the way! I Guess this son of Gondor prefers to be good guy on screen these days..

Anyway, the plot was thrilling and the treatment of asian/brown passengers was a touch of reality. The plane was the most massive and sophisticated one I have ever seen with 2 level seating schemes withall the comforts under the sun!

Rock Idol Worship>>SuperFuzz BigMuff

2006-02-01T21:50:00.000+05:30

Im dazed and bedazzled. Heard of Indian, Popstars, Rappers but Grungers?? from our Soil?? Im not talking about rockers who can occasionally belt out a NIRVANA, AIC or Soundgarden cover...

Chanced upon Rock Idol 2005 on VH1 and I was blessed with the melancholic chaotic melodies of Superfuzz Bigmuff, Delhi based collegeband. True grunge style, good self compositions and excellent vocals. Watching the trio perform, I could'nt stop recalling NIRVANA! especially, looking at the lead singer/guitarist performing with concealed angst and rage. Seamless and ecstatic! NO WONDER, they were adjudged as the best performers with Top Honors! I have been hearing rave reviews about them for past two years espcially after IIT-D festival but actually got to hear them for the first time, thanks to VH1. Great going boys.Waiting for your first album!

Superfuzz Bigmuff are Sanchal (Vocals and Guitars), Nikhil (Bass) & Abhimanyu (Drums)

IPO mania

2006-01-30T22:05:00.000+05:30

The flurry of IPOs hitting the market makes one really ponder.Whether these companies are flooding the market for resouces or they are simply tapping the market flooded with resources???A decade back some of these companies offer documents would'nt have even warranted a look from the investor. Check out some issues from the past year:

Ramsarup Industries
Radha Madhav Corporation Ltd
Shri Ramruprai balaji Steels Ltd
Era Constructions IndiaLtd
Saksoft Ltd
Ramksrishns Forgings Ltd
Surya Pharmaceuticals Ltd

Today, the ever discerning, IPO crazy Indian Investor would go to the extent of covertly opening 50,000 Demat Accounts to win a better lottery in the allotment of the quota for retail investors. Some of the companies came out with measly issue sizes , like Saksoft for Rs. 7.5 Crores. If you doubt whether these issues were fully subscribed, you will be surprised by how many times...

Any layperson can tell you that equity entails and contributes to high cost of capital, that too at a time when interest rates are going down the hill. So why are these corporates going the equity route??? At the macro level, the poverty level in India has come down steeply to 26%..Economy is booming, and then the market is flush with funds from increased salaries and profits with limited investment options. At the micro level the burgeoning SINK & DINK households, are wondering where to invest money, earn high returns and pay paltry tax...Enter the stock market..through the primary doors of IPO. FDs interests have fallen and so the interest in FD. Plethora of mutual funds confuse their simple minds.Hence IPO. Gone are the days of filling those long application forms, running to the nearest collecting center, getting turned away because the of broker code! Now, your DP service provider entices you with sms of the upcoming offers and that your IPO application is just a CLICK away(so is your passbookdebit!)

These hitherto unknown companies have sensed the pulse of restless Investor who is desperate to jump into the swelling stock market and share a pie. Moreover getting a bank loan involves much more formalities than IPO( specially after the exit of CCI)! But investors much excercise due caution/diligence before putting their hard-earned money into companies. Every bubble must burst.

By the way, I enjoyed a Parody on IPOs in DNA Newspaper:

Beggars jump on the IPO bandwagon

Harshal A Shah

Tuesday, January 24, 2006 19:50 IST

Rajdhani

2006-01-24T16:21:00.000+05:30

Last week I was on a 2-day whirlwind work trip to Delhi(or Daheli for the northerners). To begin with ,I chose the Sarkari carriers to transport me to the Rajdhani( whatever was wrong with me!) The flight scheduled for 9 am actually took off at 10 am as the inflight captain incharge pleaded "due to technical problems with the toilets at the rear end....our engineers are attending..we regret the delay."

On air there was a foul smell emanating from the rear end and no one complained( probably being used to this).My seat being only third from the rear, I was squirming with discomfort and cursing those engineers. Anyways engineers are not trained to be janitors!

I was famished but didnt feel like touching the breakfast or anything coming from the rear end. The cabin temperature was appropriately set lower than usual to cool our tempers! Just when I was hoping for a cup of hot beverage to soothe my throat and defreeze my fingers,our good-old captain incharge PAed "due to technical problems no coffee/tea will be served in this flight...we regret.." and left me pondering:

Are coffee/tea made in toilets? How are they related?
Do coffee/tea come under any technical discipline?
Did the toilet engineers drink all the coffee/tea?
Was the coffee/tea maker out of order?If so will it be the Janitor who shall attend to it as a return favor?
Will I get a free beverage at the airport inlieu?

While I was searching for answers the flight landed at IGI airport in Daheli. Soon I was scrambling towards the same rear-end.......to EXIT ASAP and while I was at it, I saw the suggestion box very cleverly placed .................at the Rear End!!!!

Cardinal BottomLine: A change in logo cannot bring a change in service!

Mumbai Festival

2006-01-17T22:12:00.000+05:30

Mumbai Festival is on..there are stalls eveywhere selling everything from a safety pin to ur dream holiday!
This city is never short of shopping holes. Almost every third day you have a new exposition/exhibition/utsav/ fair being held in some corner of the city sprucing up hitherto abandoned grounds to airconditioned Free Market domes. To catch hold of the kiddies you have fun zones and food courts. To couple that you have sarkar sponsored handicrafts exhibitions where you can find wares from plastic(!) to metal((!!)The previous year just passed leading up the shopping mania to the pinnacle. Now when it just seemed that the wallets felt a bit relaxed and safe, Mumbai Festival takes over.

I really dont know how different it is from any of the usual exhibitions except for the extensive press coverage. The organisers have even managed to rope in some artists for stage/culture shows..Like a mumbaikar cares! Mumbai and culture? Although it might do some good to new artists wanting to catch some attention

Ok after all said and one, if you still be a part of this festival, BE MY GUEST! (PG ofcourse!. Like I said, Mumbai and culture?)

The Picture of Dorian Gray

2006-01-12T20:37:00.000+05:30

If you have watched the movie " The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen" you can instantly recall the titled character "Dorian Gray" potrayed by Irish Actor Stuart Townsend. While each person in the league possessed unique and singular skills (Aceshooting,Immortality, scientific wisdom, vampirical, Split personality,invisibility..etc) I was puzzled by the inclusion of the vain and corrupt Dorian Gray, who apparently did'nt seem to possess any special area of expertise..

Only as the plot progresses we get to liken the character to the protagonist of Oscar Wilde's Gothic Novel " The Picture of Dorian Gray". In fact all the league members are literary charactersfrom the 19th Century. In " The Picture of Dorian Gray", his friend Basil paints a beautiful portrait of Dorian. When Dorian sees the finished portrait he exults"...I shall grow old, and horrible, and dreadful. But this picture will remain always young. It will never be older than this particular day of June.... If it were only the other way! If it were I who was to be always young, and the picture that was to grow old! For that — for that — I would give everything! Yes, there is nothing in the whole world I would not give! I would give my soul for that!"

By saying that Dorian sells his soul and his yearning for eternal youth soon comes true and the picture ages instead of him. This boon corrupts him and turns him into a vile, wicked and treacherous human being. All his crimes and sins are reflected by the aging and hideous visage of the potrait, which he dare not look at. In the book, towards the end, he seeks redemption for all his sins which he achieves (supposedly) after attaining Death by looking at his own painting.

Although there was a twist in the potrayal of Dorian Gray in the movie (He was actually forced to look at his own portrait), it suited well with the plot , as he was the traitor in the league! Im not sure whether he sought immortality more than endless charm!

Our Vast English and Indian Literature have numerous examples of Vanity of the woman..the female form priding on its female form.. I guess Dorian Gray was created to bring some pride to Male form ?!?

BTW Stuart Townsend played the part with exceptional style and panache! Watch out for his witty oneliners and repartees !

A Promise Kept- Wedding Crashers

2006-01-08T11:38:00.000+05:30

Well, I made a promise and I kept it...I promised myself I'll watch " Wedding Crashers" and did catch it, albeit the second day first show(small lapse). This friend of mine got free passes to the show and I was thrilled beyond words..Then when I actually went to the theater we both made 20% of the total crowd..you do the math..So much for free passes!

But the movie was really enjoyable..very hilarious throughout . The performances from Vince Vaughn(Jeremy) & Owen Wilson(John) trying to potray ladykillers after crasing into weddings were a laugh riot!! Except for some risque /smutty dialogues,the screenplay was generally good. Christopher Walker maintained the whacky persona as always. All the chracters of his disfunctional family were well cast! Towards the end, he supporting his daughter's wishes to choose "John" with his dubious background over the mighty/obsessive fiance "Zack" was convincing! Vince &Owen make a really good team and share excellent on-screen chemistry. The audience was in splits watching their frequent arguments over the "Cardinal rules of crashers".

Watch out for the scene where Owen reverently lauds the funeral crasher as "Innovator" !!

We could really learn a tip or two to crash into weddings!

Vince Vaughn can add one more to his fan list!
Im waiting to catch him on "Be cool"!!

Cheerio

Monkey See Monkey Do

2006-01-04T22:20:00.000+05:30

Its no news that I am a big Kurt Cobain fan. But why I wrote that title line was not just to allude to his famous track but to really mean it " STAY AWAAAAAY"!!! from that Ape movie of the year...KING KONG.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0360717/

Worst, I wacthed it with a Peter Jackson (PJ) Freak who shivers even at the sight of a roachling. PJ, the creator of the oscar winning Lord of the Rings Trilogy has come back after years of sabbatical (and aerobics!) with the remake of the ever popular KING KONG. Most of us remember the earlier one starring Jeff Bridges and Jessica Lange in supporting roles( ;-).

Now the point is, when a LOTR buff like me, goes on to watch a much hyped PJ movie with great expectations and then comes home crying.. its not out of fright or sadness but for unwarranted waste or 3 precious hours of your life( sleep if u were stupid enough to watch the night show). The KONG actually graces the screen only after first-half .Till then you are not even sure whether you are in the right theater.

Most of the snares are predictable. Most of the backgrounds looked so run of the mill ( as if lifted straight from LOTR)! The actions of Ape looked really made-up..Despite several fight sequences between strange, weild looking CG creatures( Dynos, Goblins, Pods, Creepy Crawlies..you imagine it, they got it) , there was no "shrill" factor"..Not a drop of blood, for that matter!

BUT, Jack Black and Adrien Brody saved the grace by bringing in their best! and the panoramic view from on top of the Empire States Bldg was good.. The natives of the forbidden Skull Island looked really disgusting!

Watch at your Own Risk or Just Stay Away !

Sad But True

2006-01-02T21:20:00.000+05:30

I had nothing(absolutely) to do the last two days and so watched a lot of TV. VH1 aired "Big in 05" - a taped event showcasing the top acts in Music in 2005. What struck me was one of the live performances was of "Def Leppard" doing "Pour some sugar on me"...What is it???1985? Scott Weiland ( Ex STP, now GNR, future???) was a presenter and looked awful. It was all Rap/R&B/Funk that took centre stage. Could have played some Rock, for crying out loud or may be Nirvana-Unplugged!

I switched to HBO and watched LOTR-"Chapter-1" for the n+1th time. Old Habits die hard..So despite irritating adverts, patience got the better of me and I watched the movie till near end( I have no heart to watch after Boromir's death). "Freak!!!!" my dad called me after getting no response when he asked Why I owned DVD of the movie and still watched the movie on HBO in between the adverts!!
The decision is "Mine!, My Own!!!, My Precioussss!!!"

My cousin(a.k.a Gollum) went a step ahead and watched LOTR-"Chapter-2" on HBO that aired soon after LOTR-1, and watched the very same on DVD with a friend in the following morning and Iam called a FREAK???? When you are crazy, you abandon reasoning...like Saruman!

I also got to see "Equilibrium" on SM and it was gripping..Kudos to Christian Bale. His transition from a cold human exterminator to an emotional friend was compelling and mindblowing. Its plot was Matrix Superlative! WB Yeats' poem recital by Sean Bean was poignant and excellent.

Last few months I was praying for "Wedding Crashers" to release in Mumbai and looks some somebody listened!
It opens on Jan 6 and I'll be there FDFS.

Will be back with reviews..
HNY

Ps: Im looking for
1) some cool recommendations in Alternative/Grunge music..Suggestions/Links welcome.
2) "Posies"Music, specially "start a life"

'ere Cometh MMVI AD.

2005-12-29T20:04:00.000+05:30

The New Year always brings some sort of excitement in every one . There's the sanguine cheer that fills the air.However eventful the past year might have been, one always waits for the New Year, forever believing that supernatural/almighty might shower more blessings on the mortals..(or I call it children of the lesser Gods)

But the so called excitement to jump into the new Calendar year is not particularly because of great expectations. but more because of the fact that you have actually gotten rid of a year full of forgettable and unplesant events... AnnusHorriblis!

People actually indulge in excessive partying on the NewYear's eve....the only logical explanation?..Its basically to forget the past year!!!! because, why else would anyone want to start the first day of theNew year with a hangover???

From all of Mumbai's biggest hotels to the road side lunch homes have arranged for elaborate new year eve festivities where in you pay,drink, jump around and later crash on your beds(or wherever!),. The following morning tells the same old story!!

So...Friends, OPEN your eyes.!!!. When will you ever learn??
There is no such thing as " NewYear"..
Its just old wine in new bottle(pun intended)

Happy New Year!

Ps: I liked the song 'Open your eyes" by Alter Bridge
For people who dont have party tickets watch LOTR with me on HBO on New YearEve..Its definitely a better bargain!

DIY-X-Mas Tree

2005-12-25T17:31:00.000+05:30

Like everybody else, I was totally caught up by the festivities surrounding the yuletide. While all my friends were enjoying their leftover CLs with their families out in Peaks of Mahabaleshwar or Lonavla, here I was !! getting nowhere even remotely close to a weekend plan..

So I dragged my only immediate albeit old, company I had in my sight...My dad.. to the local market to get him into buying a miniature(a.k.a fake) X-mas tree, on which I could spend time decorating and somehow kill time (surely I was being influenced by the Santa-Excesses on TV these days). I carried 100 bucks with me because I was operating on a shoe-string budget..Moreover my shoes were broken too, so I had to save for a new one!

It was then I was pleasantly awakened by something...This cute looking, self standing, moderately decorated, 12 inch X-mas tree which I fell for, was on sale only for 10 bucks..I confirmed and reconfirmed the price with the hawker...He gave me the same poker face reply"Dus rupaiye,ten rupees" . I bought it with utter disbelief ..and also bought some decorative thinggies to hang on the tree, a miniature salontro.. all for 5 bucks.

I used to ponder...afterall, What value does 10 Rs note carry today??

Now I know, It can definitely make a poor man's Christmas!!!!

Chill Out !!!! Boy, I mean it !!!

2005-12-24T14:36:00.000+05:30

Its not that its Saturdy today and Im chilling my Weekend off. Its chilling cold out here and Im freezing my @$$ off. Mumbai is not a place where winter is felt in the day. An occasional 15 degrees by the night might give you some hint of it.

But for the past 3 days its been so cold out here (11 degrees)...feels like Delhi and we Mumbaikars are'nt used to it. My toes recoil on the icy floor. The water off the tap gives papercuts. We dont have "Garam Kapde" in our closets and nor heaters in the living room. Our Offices dont regulate AC to suit outside temperature so you find almost everyone sniffling and sneezing. The pollution and the smog do their bit to accentuate the situation.

The MET office says some" western disturbance" exists and we dont understand that kinda english. Whatever, the resilient Mumbaikar can take the Sweltering Summer Heat, Lashing Monsoon Deluges and so the called Winter with relative ease. When will it snow? Im sure we'll handle that too!!

Merry X-Mas!!

Johnny Johnny.. Yes papa.!..Eating Sugar...Yes Papa!!!

2005-12-24T12:10:00.000+05:30

Just yesterday I watched Tim Burton's "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" and what can I say, When its Tim Burton looking for a weird looking factory owner...there he is, Johnny Depp. What is the matter with these two?

Tim Burton is bent on putting an end to Depp's career by hanging funny looking faces ( Edward ScissorHands, Ed Wood, Sleepy Hollow) on good old Johnny who never gets the hint. On the contrary he wants to work more with Tim. Now Johnny has done a voice over for Tim's Coprse Bride. Johnny is much more capable than that..He can play such intriguing roles as in Donnie Brasco, Nick of Time, and my fav "Whats eating Gilbert Grape?"

And as far as C&CF is concerned, the chocolate was the best part. Johnny seemed to have borrowed Whitney Houston's teeth and looks really feminine like some guy finding his Neverland with a bunch of kids.

Sorry Johnny...Good Luck Next Time!!!

Sean Bean for James Bond!!!

2005-12-23T10:40:00.000+05:30

How about that?

Because people who've watched Golden Eye would totally agree. 006's performance was one of Sean's best and oustanding one. He's got all that JB needs...charm,wit,"pithy comebacks"..and a damn good brit accent that a JB fan would die for..and lately he's been looking for a change from his typecast role of the rogue/Russian/bad guy roles and he's succeeding. LOTR/Troy/North Country were a revelation. Dont look at his age because if Pierce Brosnan could do it in his late 40s, so could SB.. atleast a couple.

Whoever this Daniel Craig guy is..I dunno nothing about him but only heard that he is blonde and I can't imagine how he could fit the role of Bond, James Bond!

Lately Sean is shooting for "The Sharpe's Challenge" in Rajasthan..I hope bollywood bigshots will not lose this opportunity to rope him into a Hindi movie !...May be a cameo or an item number perhaps!!!

Ana's Song

2005-12-22T19:57:00.000+05:30

If you have listened to Silverchair's "Ana Song" or watched its video, you'll be amazed by its likeness to a typical Nirvana song ( "Rape me"). Not to mention the semblances of Kurt Cobain in the lead singer's hairdo/posture . Not suprising, if you knew Nirvana is one among thier major influences.

Nirvana's untimely demise left a big void left in the World of grunge...but no one knew whether there would be a new torch bearer to lead the angst-ridden discerning youth. Lane Staley's suicide orphaned AIC...STP was hit by substance abuse problems..PJ's music geting different..Of course there were a lot of comers and goners..but none with a lasting footprint. This does not hold true with other genres like plain rock, rap or metal as you have a lot of bands to switch to.

That is why ardent Nirvana fan like me can never fill the void by listening to any other kind of music. The loud and metallic Soundgarden has turned softer in the reincarnated "Audioslave" with only Chris Cornell remaining. He does'nt even play the guitar. I've listened to "Like a stone"and " Be yourself". Pretty hummable, but no where close to grunge.Guess they had to change with the times...but thats what fans like me can't bear.

Among others, I ve also noticed Billy Corgan's (of Smashing Pumpkins) solo efforts ..

Is grunge dead?
Nevermind

Lord of the Ring

2005-12-21T08:17:00.000+05:30

Ive got to let this out:
Over the last one month, I ve watched LOTR- FOTR for about 20 times, and mind it !, this tally does not include TTT & ROTK. Now why you may ask?
A cousin of mine (a she-elf, mech engineer and car enthusiast) blogs regularly about this trilogy and I thought hey! whats so great about this movie anyways. Hence I actually watched it for the first time 4 yrs after its official release and got sucked right in. Not only that, elvish is like our mother tongue now ,and we talk just like gollum/gandalf/boromir/aragorn assuming these characters as situation suits. I keep raving about it to all the non-enthusiasts trying to extract some form of interest/inclination(but in vain)!

But for those who havent watched this movie yet..(not to worry, there are several like muh) ...WATCH it..better late than never!

If any of you lucky got to watch the extended editions( not officially released in here) then please rave to me about it..specially MEN of GONDOR!

"
Frodo ......What have I done?
Im sorry"
..Boromir

PS: BTW, I'm the biggest fan of Boromir

"Seasons in the sun"

2005-12-20T20:24:00.000+05:30

I thought that song had shot the Irish Boyband Westlife to fame ( and subsequent break-up) but was really amazed and purely thrilled to hear Kurt's version of the same song. The version circulating in the net is being claimed to be the one he performed live in Rio. He can convert a song of virtually any genre with grunge undertones with natural ease. I wish he could have done more such covers, although his albums Incesticide, Unplugged and Outcesticide(posthumus) had several of them.

The Outcesticide album was not released in India..Thats because the distributors of rock music have vague and limited knowledge of varied musical taste of Indian youth.There is too much of misconception about basic categorisation of Rock & Pop, leave alone metal, punk.. Ever since Indi Pop came to mainstream, it was curtains to Rock as we know it. Now music from across the border is more easily available than your favourite groups.Nirvana/PJ/AIC/Mudhoney/STP/Filter have such cult following amoung the Gen X/Y crowds..You have to see it to believe it.

The other day I approached a smart looking salesperson in one of the top music shops in Mumbai and asked whether theyve got Foo Fighter's latest album and he drew a complete blank. He asked me to spell the name of the band ( I lost my cool by then) and was smiling wryly while noting it( I lost my hope).

"what else could i write"...
Kurt Cobain

Whatever happened to Grunge?

2005-12-19T21:12:00.000+05:30

Looks like the G world from the world of Music is near extinction. The only word to describe the current genre of music that plays on the local Indian music channels ( call them International, if you dare) is JUNK.
Nirvana, AIC, Soundgarden...have all become "classics" just like their frontmen. Some groups have disbanded for greener pastures and some for lack of material.
As an ardent grunge lover my only question is can Grunge ever die?? SOS

" Come as you are, as you were, as I want you to be"
KurtCobain
RIP